IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The plans below show a harbour in 2000 and how it looks today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #harbour #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The two maps illustrate the significant changes that have occurred in Porth
Harbour
 between the year 2000 and today.
Overall
, it seems that Porth
Harbour
 has undergone a transformation from a somewhat basic
harbour
 area to a more developed tourist destination with the addition of various amenities. One notable change is the replacement of the disused castle with a newly constructed hotel, reflecting a shift towards catering to visitors.
Additionally
, cafes and shops have been introduced along the road,
further
 enhancing the area’s appeal to tourists. These new developments make the
harbour
 more inviting and convenient for both locals and visitors. If we examine the current map, we can observe that the existing facilities,
such
 as the marina and public beach, remain in place, but the development of new amenities like the hotel and shops has significantly altered the landscape. A final significant change is the inclusion of private land allocated for the hotel, highlighting the area’s modernization and commercial growth.
Submitted by bahram.azizzade on

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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear and comprehensive response to the task, effectively highlighting the main changes in Porth Harbour between 2000 and today. However, it could benefit from the inclusion of more specific examples and numbers where appropriate, such as the number of cafes or the size of the private land allocated to the hotel.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with a clear logical structure and well-defined paragraphs. However, adding a stronger conclusion that summarizes the overall transformation of the harbour would improve the essay's cohesiveness.
task achievement
While the main points are supported well, incorporating more specific details and comparisons would strengthen the essay's overall clarity and comprehensiveness.
task achievement
The essay offers a clear comparison between the harbour in 2000 and today, demonstrating an understanding of the changes and their significance.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay is logical and easy to follow, with distinct paragraphs that guide the reader through the description and analysis of the changes.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a cohesive flow, with each paragraph building on the previous one to create a clear narrative of the harbour's development.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • harbour (or harbor)
  • docks
  • shipping lanes
  • warehouses
  • recreational areas
  • infrastructure
  • additions
  • removals
  • facilities
  • environmental sustainability
  • economic impact
  • local community
  • capacity
  • technological advancements
  • industrial shipping
  • recreational use
  • surrounding infrastructure
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