Research shows that some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that, millions of people engage in unhealthy activities. What is the cause of this? What can be done? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experiences.

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Reasearchers
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Researchers

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found that human
activities
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either be good or bad for health. Unaware of
this
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, unhealthy
activities
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are engaged by millions of
people
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. There are several reasons behind
this
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practice
such
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as
sedentary
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a sedentary

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show examples
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life style
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lifestyle

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and
hectic
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a hectic

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work
shedule
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schedule

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. I believe feasible can be taken to change and manage
this
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situation well. To
be begin
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begin

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, one
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with, one

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of the prominent
reason
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reasons

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for unhealthy is the hectic workload of
the
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apply

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people
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. To be more precise, nowadays , men and women should go the work
due to
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the
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apply

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financial necessity
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Linking Words

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Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Correct word choice
and due

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due to
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because of

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that they find some options which are easier to carry their lives. Eventually that
are
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is

The verb are does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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likely to be
a
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an

The article a may be incorrect. Consider changing it to agree with the beginning sound of the following word unhealthy.

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unhealthy activity.
The
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A

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good example is , working
mother
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mothers

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do not have enough time to prepare the meal for their children ,
thus
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they give fast food which causes
lot
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a lot

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of detrimental effects
for
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on

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children
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children's

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health
such
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as obesity and addiction
of
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to

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unhealthy food. To tackle
this
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issues
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issue

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some measures
shoild
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should

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be taken by parents is imperative.
Firstly
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, parents
makesure
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make sure

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that their children must consume
a healthy products
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healthy products
a healthy product

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,
thus
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they manage their work time to prepare
for
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apply

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a meal
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meal
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meals

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or
practicing
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practice

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the easier breakfast
recipies
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recipes

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. If parents provide good
foods
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food

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for their
chilrens
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children
children's

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they do not tend to eat
out side
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outside

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anymore.
Furthermore
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, technological
improvments
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improvements
improvement

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is
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are

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the major cause of
the
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apply

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unhealthy
activities
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like
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a sedentery
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sedentery
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sedentary

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Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

life style
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lifestyle

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show examples
.
In other words
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, now we can see technological innovations
are
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being

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introduced in every field like
house hold
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household

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amenities which are easier
human
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for human

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day-to-day
activities
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,
thus
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human
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humans

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become lazy to do even
thieir
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their

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own
works
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work

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.
Although
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, innovative
amenties
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amenities

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useful
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are useful

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and
time saving
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time-saving

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,
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Linking Words

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Linking Words

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thus
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they

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leads
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lead

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the unhealthy
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life style
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lifestyles

The word life style doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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among
people
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.
For instance
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, if we require to wear
a
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apply

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cloth
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clothes

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which
is
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are

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dirty , just put
Correct pronoun usage
them onto
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onto
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in

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the washing machine , which is washed and
dry
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driers

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the cloths
with in
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within

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few
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a few

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minutes . To
eradiacte
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eradicate

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this
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issue the government should provide
awarness
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awareness

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about the detrimental effects of these kinds of unhealthy
activities
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. like workshops, seminars and awareness advertisements . which actions can
be help
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help

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to curb
it
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apply

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these practices
.
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?

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In conclusion, there are several reasons
cause
Verb problem
apply

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to
engaging
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engage

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the unhealthy
activities
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of
people
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such
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as workload and advancement in technology. If
people
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and government
do
Verb problem
take

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show examples
some feasible measures that
helps
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help

The singular verb helps does not appear to agree with the plural subject some feasible measures. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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to eradicate these kinds of effects in future. Unless human
life
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would be endangered.

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introduction opening
The introduction should succinctly introduce the main points that will be discussed in the essay. Work on clearly stating the problem and the solutions without being vague or overly broad.
main argument clarity
Ensure that your main points are clearly stated in each paragraph and tie back to the question. Remove any redundancies and unnecessary details that may confuse the reader.
grammar precision
Watch for small grammatical errors and typos that may detract from the readability of your essay. Proofread your work to identify and fix these mistakes before submission.
structural coherence
Each paragraph should have a clear and distinct role. Ensure that you use appropriate linking words and phrases to maintain the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
conclusion clarity
Your conclusion should effectively summarize the points discussed and provide a clear directive or recommendation. Review your conclusion to ensure it provides a strong closing to your argument.
content alignment
The essay addresses the main points of the prompt and offers reasons for why people engage in unhealthy activities and potential solutions to mitigate these actions.
example usage
Relevant examples are included, which make the arguments more tangible and believable. This is essential for demonstrating a complete response to the task.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • awareness
  • social pressure
  • cultural norms
  • addiction
  • dependency
  • coping mechanism
  • stress
  • mental health
  • healthier alternatives
  • marketing
  • advertising
  • consequences
  • habit
  • affordable
  • readily available
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