The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Science
has played an integral role in shaping the modern world and solving serious problems faced by human beings. There is a notable brief that the most pivotal purpose of science
is to enhance individuals' lives
. I strongly agree with this
view, as scientific discoveries have significantly improved the quality
of life and spurred technological progressions that address global issues.
One of the key measures of science
is to advance the quality
of citizens' lives
. This
means that scientific endeavours can make daily living easier and more comfortable, especially in fields like healthcare, technology, and communication. One primary example is the invention of antibiotics, which has undoubtedly reduced mortality rates and saved millions of lives
. Furthermore
, people's interactions can be influenced by the progression of technology in communication such
as the Internet, which allows access to instant information and enhances societal welfare.
In addition
to improving the quality
of the citizens, the discovery of science
is essential in terms of technological progress. Science
breakthroughs like renewable energy, have increasingly impacted a better life. For instance
, the innovation of solar energy has essentially decreased the use of fossil fuels as well as
fulfilled energy demands worldwide. Similarly
, the introduction of electric vehicles has contributed to alleviating climate change, benefiting from good air quality
and a better environment.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that improving people's lives
is the most important aim of science
. From enhancing the quality
of everyday challenges through medical innovations to advancing technological progress that tackles obstacles globally, science
has ensured individuals to live
. Change the verb form
lives
Therefore
, scientific advancements should be the priority to address problems all around the world.Submitted by mohamadazhariazar on
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coherence cohesion
While the essay is generally well-organized, consider using a bit more variety in your sentence structures to enhance readability and engagement. For instance, instead of starting multiple sentences with 'Science...,' you could use introductory phrases or clauses to add variety.
task achievement
Provide a bit more depth in the examples. For instance, when discussing antibiotics, consider mentioning specific impacts like the treatment of bacterial infections that were previously fatal, or when referring to renewable energies, mention specific countries or contexts where these technologies have been transformative.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, body paragraphs that support the thesis, and a logical conclusion which strengthens the overall coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The essay effectively addresses the prompt and provides a comprehensive response, covering multiple aspects of how science improves people's lives.
task achievement
Strong points are well-supported by relevant examples, such as the impact of antibiotics and renewable energy technologies.