As a result of tourism and the increasing number of people travelling, there is growing demand for more flights. What problems does this have on the environment? What measures could be taken to solve the problems?
Due to
growth
of numbers in tourism, the need for Correct article usage
the growth
flights
has increased. This
essay will discuss the problems
associated with growth
of flight Add an article
the growth
due to
more leisure travel and will provide some solutions to those problems
.
The main two problems
are higher carbon
and other toxins emission
and Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
health
problems
in people
living near the airports
. Firstly
, more flights
creates
a larger Change the verb form
create
carbon
footprint, which causes
global warming, increases
the growth of greenhouse Correct word choice
and increases
gases emission
. Fix the agreement mistake
gas emissions
For example
, in the last
30 years the demand for flights
quadrupled and following that carbon
emissions doubled, causing climate warming, which causes
a risk on
animal species, makes icebergs Change preposition
to
to
melt and is a risk to Fix the infinitive
apply
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
earth
ecosystems. Change noun form
earth's
Secondly
, other toxins that are released during take off
and landing are a risk to local Add a hyphen
take-off
people
's health
. For instance
, people
who live near airports
are twice as likely to have respiratory problems
compared to people
who live further
away. As a
result
living near an airport Add a comma
result,
causes
serious health
problems
and funds that could have been saved otherwise
have to go into helping those people
.
To mitigate carbon
emissions, the most effective measure is lowering the amount
of travellers, Change the quantifier
number
that
can be done with Correct pronoun usage
which
a
legislation that bans short Remove the article
apply
flights
when the distance is easily accessible in zero or lower emission
transport. Add a hyphen
lower-emission
For example
, in France
there is a ban on domestic Add a comma
France,
flights
if they can be made by train in under 5 hours. Solution
to lowering Add an article
The solution
A solution
health
problems
in people
living near the airport is building airports
further
away from people
’s houses. When the distance is bigger it is scientifically proven that there are less
Change the quantifier
fewer
health
problems
associated with aviation pollution. As a result
, banning shorter flights
and building airports
further
away from cities will make flying a less desirable option and will result in less flight and less pollution that affect global ecosystems and people
.
In conclusion, a higher number of tourism flights
causes
toxic gas emissions and risks local
Change preposition
to local
health
. To solve these problems
, the government should implement some compulsory legislation that lowers flight numbers and protects people
’s health
. In my opinion
the air tourism number has to decrease and the government should be heavily involved.Add a comma
opinion,
Submitted by oimigle on
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task achievement
Ensure to maintain a balanced coverage of both problems and solutions within the essay.
task achievement
Provide more relevant and specific examples to support your points, particularly for proposed solutions.
coherence cohesion
Use more variety in linking phrases and cohesive devices to enhance flow between paragraphs and ideas.
coherence cohesion
Work on sentence structure and avoid repetition of certain words or phrases to improve readability.
task achievement
The essay provides a complete response by addressing both problems and solutions related to increased tourism flights.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are clear and well-structured, providing a strong framework for the essay.
task achievement
Main points are generally well-supported with some relevant examples, demonstrating a good understanding of the topic.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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