Maintaining public libraries is now a waste of money since computer technology is already replacing their function. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In recent years,
i
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I
show examples
think people
believe
Wrong verb form
have believed
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that
keep
Verb problem
staying
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alive of
labraries
Correct your spelling
laboratories
in nowadays is the unuseless of money and
Correct article usage
a wastage
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wastage
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waste
show examples
of time
due to
Linking Words
innovation
Correct article usage
the innovation
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of modern items like
computer
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computers
show examples
,
laptop
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laptops
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and smartphones.
Which available
Correct pronoun usage
Available
show examples
everybooks
Correct your spelling
every books
every book
and all the things which can be seen in the
library
Use synonyms
.
For
Change preposition
From
show examples
my
prespective
Correct your spelling
perspective
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
partillay refere
Correct your spelling
partly refer
the technology in some situations.
For instance
Linking Words
during travelling.Some drawbacks of
non availability
Add a hyphen
non-availability
show examples
of
Use synonyms
library
Correct article usage
the library
show examples
is
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are
show examples
Correct article usage
a silence
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silence
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silent
show examples
environment and peaceful time.
To begin
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with,
i
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I
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am strongly believe
Change the verb form
strongly believe
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that mobile phones have all
tha
Correct your spelling
the
capability
Fix the agreement mistake
capabilities
show examples
which
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
available in
libraries
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
show examples
mobile
phone
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phones
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have some specific
size
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sizes
show examples
that we can use
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
everywhere.
Furthermore
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, the
curical
Correct your spelling
crucial
cortical
advantage of mobile currently
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
we
cam
Correct your spelling
can
show examples
use in travelling.
During
Change preposition
While
show examples
travelling now you can read everything
realted
Correct your spelling
related
to knowledge and experience which
can
Verb problem
was
show examples
only available in the past in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
libraries
Use synonyms
.
Secondly
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,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
can say that
Use synonyms
library
Fix the agreement mistake
libraries
show examples
have some benefits that can not be achieved in
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
places. I really appreciated the environment of
Use synonyms
library
Add an article
the library
a library
show examples
which is totally silence which impacts
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
of our
brain
Fix the agreement mistake
brains
show examples
during
Use synonyms
study
Add an article
the study
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I think the only area in which humans
cam
Correct your spelling
can
show examples
release
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
stress he through everything
what
Change the word
that
show examples
is going on in
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
life here
he
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
just
focuse
Correct your spelling
focus
focuses
focused
on the target
what
Correct word choice
and what
show examples
can they read and learn.
Use synonyms
Library
Add an article
The library
show examples
is
also
Linking Words
the advantage of
non disturbance
Add a hyphen
non-disturbance
show examples
in technology have
otherwise
Linking Words
software like WhatsApp,Facebook and youtube which can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
distrub
Correct your spelling
disturb
disturbed
you during
Use synonyms
study
Add an article
the study
show examples
.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a lot of benefits during
Use synonyms
study
Add an article
the study
show examples
and nowadays the young generation is very busy
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
smart phone
Correct your spelling
smartphone
show examples
and
like
Change the verb form
likes
show examples
to
study
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
laptops, computers and smartphones
instead
Linking Words
of
Use synonyms
libraries
Change preposition
in libraries
show examples
. But elder people mostly like the
libraries
Use synonyms
for the relaxation and to get the knowledge in safety.
Submitted by khastafojiii on

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Coherence
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Balance
There is a clear attempt to address both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced perspective.
Task Response
The essay addresses the prompt and provides a complete response to the question.
Relevant Points
Points made about the benefits of technology and the unique environment of libraries are relevant and specific.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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