IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

the table and charts below give informations on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed

the table and charts below give informations on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed
#informations #police #budget #area #britain #money #show
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A glance at the given table and pie charts depicts valuable data about how the budget is distributed for several sectors in one specific area of England.
In addition
Linking Words
, the table demonstrates the
sources
Use synonyms
 of
money
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the majority of
money
Use synonyms
 was spent on the income of officers and staff in both 2017 and 2018.
Moreover
Linking Words
, more than half of the
money
Use synonyms
sources
Use synonyms
 were achieved from the National Government in the period shown. The total highlighted budget experienced an increase during
this
Linking Words
 time. It is obvious that the highest proportion of the budget was spent on salaries, 75% and 69 % in 2017 and 2018, respectively.
In
Linking Words
contrast
Add a comma
contrast,
show examples
 the lowest percentage of expenditure belongs to technology.
Although
Linking Words
 salary expenditure declined over
this
Linking Words
 period, the
money
Use synonyms
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
spent on the technology sector rose. Other
sources
Use synonyms
 (e.g., grants) were the lowest level of the
money
Use synonyms
 resources for two specific years, a mere 38 million pounds per year.
However
Linking Words
, the biggest proportion of
money
Use synonyms
’s resources is related to the
money
Use synonyms
that is
Linking Words
 obtained from the National Government, a staggering 177.8 million pounds in 2018. Other
sources
Use synonyms
 (e.g., grants) and National Government
money
Use synonyms
 resources witnessed stability during the period.
Submitted by speher2000behroozifar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words sources, money with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "give" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: