IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In a number of countries some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing high speed railway lines for inter-city travel. Others believe this money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is believed that it is better to allocate a significant amount of money to building
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
show examples
 railway
lines
Use synonyms
 for
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 between neighbourhoods in
city
Add an article
the city
show examples
. Some others claim that
this
Linking Words
 budget should
be spend
Change the verb form
be spent
show examples
 on old public
transpot
Correct your spelling
transport
 improvement. I agree with the opinion of the benefits of spending money on
new
Correct article usage
a new
show examples
 transportation
system
Use synonyms
 for some reasons which will be discussed in
this
Linking Words
 essay. Obviously, the time people spend
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 inside a city can be reduced by using cutting-edge
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
show examples
 trains, and it is the first reason I support the idea.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, new infrastructures can be built based on the latest technology available to increase efficiency and convenience.
Finally
Linking Words
, creating something new is faster and easier than repairing an existing
system
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
transportation
Correct article usage
a transportation
show examples
system
Use synonyms
, as repairing needs the determination of the problem first and
then
Linking Words
 solving it.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
construction
Correct article usage
the construction
show examples
 of an entire
system
Use synonyms
 like railway
lines
Use synonyms
from
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the first place does not require
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
spending
Replace the word
spent
show examples
 on finding the problem. It only demands
engeneerings
Correct your spelling
engineering
engineerings
 to plan the scheme and start.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some existing public transport sections,
such
Linking Words
 as vehicles, stations and
lines
Use synonyms
,
may be
Correct your spelling
maybe
show examples
 noticeably outdated so they cannot be maintained and improved properly.
Therefore
Linking Words
, spending the available funding on them is a waste of money. It is better to leave the old-fashioned transport
system
Use synonyms
 as it is. In conclusion, the funding
allocating
Wrong verb form
allocated
show examples
 to constructing a new web of railway
lines
Use synonyms
 for
high speed
Add a hyphen
high-speed
show examples
 subways can help citizens to travel in a city in a shorter time, and It is
also
Linking Words
 more comfortable and faster.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it can cut down the energy of distinguishing an issue in the existing transport
system
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Ensure that all ideas are clearly presented and elaborated upon. Better examples and more comprehensive analysis for both sides of the argument will strengthen the essay.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetitions and ensure that each paragraph follows logically from the previous one. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be smoother.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which provides a structured layout.
task achievement
The argument for high-speed railway construction is reasonably developed, with some relevant points provided to support the perspective.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • high-speed rail
  • inter-city travel
  • economic growth
  • environmentally friendly
  • carbon emissions
  • public transportation infrastructure
  • reliability
  • service frequency
  • cost-effective
  • initial investment
  • accessibility
  • underserved areas
  • regional needs
  • budget constraints
What to do next:
Look at other essays: