Many people say that the only way to guarantee getting a good job is to complete a course of university education. Others claim that it is bette to start work after school and gain experience in the world of work. How far do you agree or disagree with the above views?
Nowadays, the trend of getting higher education in
university
has become more common. Regarding this
, there is argument
about whether finishing a course offered by Add an article
an argument
the argument
university
can guarantee a good job or Correct article usage
a university
starting
Correct word choice
whether starting
work
after school
and gaining experience
in workforce
is more beneficial. Add an article
the workforce
While
some advocate for studying in
Change preposition
at
university
will equip student
with more knowledge, others believe that the Fix the agreement mistake
students
study
case
and real case
are differents
. Correct your spelling
different
This
essay will offer both perspective
before presenting a reasonable opinion.
On Change to a plural noun
perspectives
one
hand, Correct article usage
the one
student
who Fix the agreement mistake
students
study
in the
college tend to learn something in Correct article usage
apply
more
specific area. It can be beneficial if they already have a role or position that they want to apply Add an article
a more
after
Change preposition
for after
graduated
from Wrong verb form
graduating
university
. Along with
the hard skills they gained during studies
, the soft skills are Correct pronoun usage
their studies
also
complimented by the students. College are
not only Unnecessary verb
apply
serve
as a space to Correct subject-verb agreement
serves
gaining
knowledge and skillsWrong verb form
gain
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
offering
networking and social life. Students can Wrong verb form
offers
participated
in organizations where they can learn about Change the verb form
participate
team
Correct your spelling
teamwork
work
, time management, and leadership which can be a good point if we want to apply for a job.
Conversely
, those people who start working right after school
believe that learning something in university
will not give
a significant impact since the Verb problem
have
study
case
and real case
encountered in workforce
are different. Add an article
the workforce
Study
case
that Fix the agreement mistake
cases
student
get in Fix the agreement mistake
students
university
are made by people so it is designed to be able to be solved using some method that they learned while
in actual condition, the things that happen are
often can not be controlled or predicted. Unnecessary verb
apply
Therefore
, getting experience
by working in the
specific role and field would be more beneficial.
In my view, Correct article usage
a
while
both finishing a course and getting experience
in the real workplace have their merits, I believe the combination of these will be better. It is undeniable that there is a gap between academic and industry field
but Fix the agreement mistake
fields
this
can be reduced by encouraging students who attend university
to joining
internship Wrong verb form
join
program
during their Fix the agreement mistake
programs
study
so they can get a professional Fix the agreement mistake
studies
experience
which can be addressed as additional
point for their Add an article
an additional
portofolio
. Some positions in Correct your spelling
portfolio
workforce
that Add an article
the workforce
required
more Wrong verb form
require
experience
can be fulfiled
by people who have many professional Correct your spelling
fulfilled
experience
since they are getting Change to a plural noun
experiences
work
straight after school
.
In conclusion, the argue
Replace the word
arguments
between
whether finishing Change preposition
about
course
in Add an article
the course
a course
university
or getting Add an article
a university
work
experience
after school
can guarantee a good job are offering
their own advantages. Wrong verb form
offer
While
studying in
Change preposition
at
university
will equip Add an article
the student
student
with Fix the agreement mistake
students
Add an article
the skillset
a skillset
skillset
, getting Fix the agreement mistake
skillsets
work
experience
right after school
will give them more professional experience
since they can learn directly for
Change preposition
from
real
Add an article
the real
a real
case
. Fix the agreement mistake
cases
Therefore
, adjusting curriculum
in the Correct article usage
the curriculum
university
by encourage
Change the verb form
encouraging
Add an article
the student
a student
student
to join internship Fix the agreement mistake
students
program
will offer them a better description Fix the agreement mistake
programs
about
Change preposition
of
workplace
environment.Add an article
the workplace
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task response
Ensure that your essay directly addresses all parts of the prompt in greater detail. Include more specific examples or case studies to enhance your arguments.
task response
Avoid using overly general terms like 'student' and 'university'. Specify the types of degrees or fields of work where possible.
coherence cohesion
Work on the clarity of your ideas. Some sentences could be more concise.
coherence cohesion
Proofread to correct minor grammatical and spelling mistakes, such as 'complimented' which should be 'complemented'.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion that adequately frame the essay.
task response
Main points are logically supported with reasonable arguments and context.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.