The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population In four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.

The graph below gives information about the percentage of the population In four Asian countries living in cities from 1970 to 2020, with predictions for 2030 and 2040.
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The line graph compares the proportion of people who are living in the Philippines, Malaysia, Thailand, and
Indonesia
Use synonyms
between 1970 and 2020 and the expected figures for 2030 and 2040.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
the population in four Asian countries went up and will continue to grow.
Although
Linking Words
Indonesia
Use synonyms
has the lowest population, it would overcome each of the Philippines and Thailand. Looking in more detail at the number of residents in
Indonesia
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, which began with roughly 15% of the total in 1970, there was a gradual rise in the figure, reaching almost 50% in 2010. The number of people who live in the cities is expected to increase more to account for 60% in 2040. Even though Thailand
intrdouced
Correct your spelling
introduced
higher than
Indonesia
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with approximately 20%, the figure upward comprises 30% in 2020, and it is likely to rise
further
Linking Words
at
Change preposition
to
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45%, which is
overall
Linking Words
less than
Indonesia
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
of the period. The figure of residents in the Philippines fluctuated between 30% and 50% over the given period. There was a massive upturn in the population in Malaysia from 30% in 1970 and making up 70% in 2020, and it is estimated to
a
Add a missing verb
be a
show examples
peak of 80% of the total.
Submitted by imaharzm on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
Vocabulary: Replace the words indonesia with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "rise" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • graph
  • percentage
  • population
  • Asian countries
  • living in cities
  • 1970
  • 2020
  • predictions
  • 2030
  • 2040
  • introduction
  • overview
  • trend
  • body paragraph
  • compare
  • predicted percentages
  • summarize
  • closing statement
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