Some think that younger people should be able to choose any job they like others think that they should think more realistically about the future. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#think #people #job #future

There is no doubt these days most of

youngest

Correct article usage

the youngest

show examples

people

tend to choose

thier

Correct your spelling

their

jobs

upon on their passions. The question is

.what

Correct your spelling

what

is the best method to choose their future

jobs

?Is It

depand

Correct your spelling

depends

depend

on what

individual

Correct article usage

an individual

show examples

likes or what the

job

sectors need

Change the punctuation

show examples

this

essay ,I will discuss both points and draw my opinion.There are several opinions about how the youngest individual

choose

Correct subject-verb agreement

chooses

show examples

their occupation .Most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people

assume that the youngest

people

should think more realistically about the future and there are many reasons

support

Fix the infinitive

to support

show examples

this

claim .

For example

, recently the number of graduate

studens

Correct your spelling

students

are profiliting with

time

which

leads

Wrong verb form

has led

show examples

increase

Correct article usage

an increase

show examples

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

rate of

comptations

Correct your spelling

competition

among

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

graduate students that

why

Add a missing verb

is why

show examples

the youngest

people

have to look

about

Change preposition

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

most of the

job

Fix the agreement mistake

jobs

show examples

which

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

required by companies and attempt to complete all the requirements in order to obtain the

job

in a short

time

.The second reason is ,

the

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

passion only is not enough because

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

passion and motivation

are changing

Wrong verb form

change

show examples

over

time

In contrast

, some of

individuals

Add an article

the individuals

show examples

are opinion that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

spend

time

jobs

you like is giving

opportunity

Add an article

an opportunity

the opportunity

show examples

to live

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

show examples

and happy life .To illustrate, most of us spend 8 hours or more in our

jobsaand

Correct your spelling

jobs

most

Change preposition

apply

show examples

jobs

in the world

depends

Correct subject-verb agreement

depend

show examples

on routine which

cause

Change the verb form

causes

show examples

some

time

bored

Change preposition

to bored

show examples

so just imagine

to spend

Change the verb form

spending

show examples

your

time

job

Add an article

a job

show examples

you don't like

this

will impact negatively

Change preposition

apply

show examples

employment life.

To conclude

we could say that

this

decision

depands

Correct your spelling

depends

on personal choices .

Submitted by aldossaryfaten95 on Mon Sep 16 2024

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task achievement

The introduction needs to be clearer. It should clearly state the purpose of the essay and outline the main points that will be discussed.

coherence cohesion

Work on the logical structure. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that the essay progresses logically from one point to the next.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points. This will help to strengthen your argument and make it more convincing.

coherence cohesion

Improve the conclusion. It should summarize the main points discussed and restate your opinion clearly.

general

Pay attention to grammar and vocabulary to improve clarity and readability.

task achievement

You have covered both viewpoints in the essay.

task achievement

The points you have made are relevant to the essay question.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
36Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

252 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some think that younger people should be able to choose any job they like others think that they should think more realistically about the future. discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that humans should be able to use animals for their own benefits, while others argue that the rights of animals should be protected. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them to school. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Using a computer every day can have more negative than positive effects on your children. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.