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Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #families #country #income #summarise #features #comparisons
The graph shows
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 average weekly spending by families in 1968 and in 2018. There are 8 kinds of
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
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. In 1968, the
most
Change the adjective
apply
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largest spending was food with 35%,
on the contrary
, in 2018, it decreased to around 17%. It is half of the
number
 in 1908. About Housing,　the rate was 10% in 1968, but In 2018, the
number
 had grown up to approximately 18%. Fuel and power
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 the least spending in both years, which were about 5%. Clothing and footwear was the same
number
 as Housing in 1908. It had declined to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half by 2018. Household goods remained steady from 1968 to 2018
with
Change preposition
at
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 8%. Personal goods lost the popularity, decreased from 8% to 4%.
In contrast
, Transport had
got
Verb problem
gained
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 popularity, in 1968, it
spended
Correct your spelling
spent
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 8% of
weekly
Add an article
the weekly
show examples
expense
Fix the agreement mistake
expenses
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, but in 2018, it got 14%. Leisure shows
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 exceptional
rising
Replace the word
rise
show examples
. The
number
 in 2018 was over twice in 1908.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • compare
  • spending patterns
  • allocated
  • weekly income
  • significant changes
  • essential items
  • food
  • housing
  • clothing
  • leisure
  • communication
  • increase
  • decrease
  • twofold rise
  • substantial increase
  • quadrupling
  • declined
  • food and drink
  • slight increase
  • prioritizing
  • necessities
  • transitioned
  • portio
  • non-essential items
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