The pie chart below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#show #sales #sectors #zealand #summarise #information #features #comparisons

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The chart exposes the differences between a variety of retail sectors in New Zealand like travel, film/music, books and clothes.

This

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data refers to the

years

Use synonyms

2003 and 2013, confronting different percentages.

Overall

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it is clear that

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the market in

this

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country has changed over the

years

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.In fact, no product has shown the same percentage in both

years

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examined.

For example

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, travel was the main sector in 2003 with 36% in the first stage, though, dropped to 29% in 2013.The lead was taken by the film/music sector, which had an improvement of 12% in ten

years

Use synonyms

, occupying a third of all sales in the final stage. The worst sector in 2003 was books, which had 19%.

Therefore

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this

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result got better by three percentage points in 2013 reaching 22%.

In contrast

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this

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result, clothes which were almost a quarter of the entire market at the beginning, crawled down by 8% ending with 16%, closing with the worst result ever registered.

Submitted by alessandro.talese on Tue Sep 17 2024

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words years with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.

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6
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

158 words

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The pie chart below show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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There are many different types of music in the world today. Why do we need music? Is the traditional music of a country more important than the international music that is heard everywhere nowadays?

The plans below show the layout of a university's sports centre now, and how it will look after redevelopment.