Some people believe that professional athletes serve as positive role models for young people, while others argue that their behavior both on and off the field has a negative influence. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #athletes #role #models #behavior #field #influence

One of the controversial opinions today is whether

athletes

are a good influence on the younger generation.In my opinion, there are both positive and negative aspects to

this

situation One of the main proofs of positive impact is the promotion of

sports

among young people More and more young people watching the

athletes

want to try their hand at it too

Furthermore

, by practicing

sports

you build a strong and purposeful person. Growing up, children who have played

sports

will feel much better and stronger than those who have never engaged in physical activity. Even jogging for 30 minutes every day can help the bodies of both adults and children feel better.

Unfortunately

Add a comma

Unfortunately,

show examples

professional

sports

have a number of negative traitsThe biggest disadvantage lies in injuries. Often

athletes

get injured in training, at competitions or during preparation for tournaments.And the more serious the injury, the more difficult it is to recover from.So is the risk of getting injured and having to leave professional

sports

. Another factor against

athletes

is their promotion of pre-workout drugs.A young and untrained body, may not be able to tolerate the composition of these substances.Unfortunately, it happens that

athletes

act as distributors of these substances, often without thinking whether they can be taken by the buyer. In conclusion, taking into account all of the above, we can say that there are both positive and negative aspects to

this

situation.If one is aware of the serious consequences that

sports

can lead to and is extremely careful, it can be said that

athletes

have a positive influence on the younger generation for the most part.

Submitted by dnm.best on Tue Sep 17 2024

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task achievement

Enhance examples to add specificity and more concrete evidence to support points. For instance, mention particular athletes who serve as role models, or describe specific incidents which reflect both sides.

coherence cohesion

Work on constructing more sophisticated and varied sentence structures. This enhancement will contribute to a more fluent and natural style of writing.

coherence cohesion

Ensure to fully develop each point in separate paragraphs with appropriate linking words to improve logical flow and cohesion.

task achievement

The essay provides a balanced discussion of both positive and negative impacts of professional athletes.

coherence cohesion

A clear introduction and conclusion are present, helping to frame the discussion effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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2Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

8 paragraphs

267 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

role model
determination
discipline
work ethic
community service
charitable activities
poor behavior
unsportsmanlike conduct
media scrutiny
public perception
materialism
physical and mental health issues
impressionable youth
high levels
pursuing sports
positive influence
negative influence

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Some people believe that professional athletes serve as positive role models for young people, while others argue that their behavior both on and off the field has a negative influence. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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