In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?

#sports #athletes #substances #performance #phenomenon

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There is a developing trend in the number of sportsmen who utilize banned substances to increase their performance in

majority

Add an article

the majority

a majority

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of professional

sports

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

essay has identified that most athletes require to be outperformed in their event as a possible cause for

this

Linking Words

issue and regular

test

Fix the agreement mistake

tests

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to be introduced to check the

sports

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people prior to commencing the competition as a solution.

To begin

Linking Words

, across the

globe

Add a comma

globe,

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many

sports

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people often want to be outstanding in their matches. Because They would be offered a huge monetary value as the price of the event and would be

world famous

Add a hyphen

world-famous

show examples

within a second without spending a dollar.

Consequently

Linking Words

, they would be able to ensure their future income sustainability by signing many commercial advertisement projects.

For instance

Linking Words

, Ronaldo is

the

Correct article usage

show examples

world-famous football player whose majority of

income

Correct pronoun usage

their income

his income

her income

show examples

reflects advertisements rather than prize-winning in matches able to sustain his future income by being outstanding.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, a possible solution for

this

Linking Words

is introducing a new medical test before their match begins.

Hence

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will assist the

sports

Use synonyms

committee in identifying the players who would violate the rules before the match commences and punish players if they are proven guilty of an offence and the punishment should be more severe than normal breach of

sports

Use synonyms

laws.

Accordingly

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

illegal substance use can be irradicated from the world sport.

To conclude

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, at present athletes have been using illegal substances to win their matches as it helps to maximize their wealth.

However

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, it is mandatory to introduce a new medical test before the event starts to identify the culprits and punish them in a significant manner.

Submitted by aravindasajith on Wed Sep 18 2024

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task achievement

You might want to elaborate more on specific examples and perhaps bring in some data or studies relevant to the topic to make your argument stronger.

task achievement

Some parts of your essay are not entirely clear, such as the phrase 'sportsmen who utilize banned substances to increase their performance in majority of professional sports.' Consider rephrasing this for better clarity.

coherence cohesion

Work on connecting your points more smoothly. For example, use transition phrases between sentences and paragraphs to improve the flow.

coherence cohesion

You have a firm structure, with an introduction, body, and conclusion, which helps in creating a comprehensive essay.

task achievement

Your ideas are aligned with the prompt, keeping the discussion relevant throughout.

task achievement

You address both the causes and solutions effectively, highlighting the primary issue and offering plausible remedies.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

272 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Performance-enhancing drugs (PEDs)
Doping
Anti-doping regulations
Detection methods
Ban substances
Ethical issues
Health risks
Fair play
Sportsmanship
Stakes
Pressure to succeed
Enforcement
Awareness programs
Testing frequency
Entourage
Science advancement
Financial gains

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In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people find it beneficial to send young children to nursery school before they go to primary school, while others think that it is good to keep them at home and spend time with their family. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Living in big cities is bad for people’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

These days, more people are going to university than in the past. They start work later in life and with higher qualifications. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this situation?

Many university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others feel it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for their qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.