‏in many countries today, both men and women need to work full time. Therefore, some people think men and women should share household task equally (e.g. cleaning and looking after children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In many countries today, both
men
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and
women
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need to work
full-timetime
Correct your spelling
full-time time
full-time-time
.
Therefore
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, some people think
men
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and
women
Use synonyms
should share
household
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tasks
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equally (e.g. cleaning and looking after children). To what extent do you agree or disagree? In recent times
household
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tasks
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have increased. It is a highly debatable issue whether
parents
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should share
household
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tasks
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, or whether it is the
women
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's responsibility.
This
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essay will outline the benefits of helping each other in-home activities. Working with both males and females together has a vital role in social life. It promotes a sense of collaboration between
parents
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which can lead to empathy.
For example
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, the result of conducted research at Glasgow University illustrates that 90% of
parents
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live happier lives than those who depend only on
women
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.
Furthermore
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, helping each other with
household
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tasks
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may open doors to exploring a new experience. If the
men
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try to cook food, potentially they will be empowered to cook various types of food.
Thus
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, they could learn and gain experience from each other.
In addition
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,
parents
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can learn to become independent people.
this
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may help them when they travel abroad.
For instance
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, my friend Fatma her husband always helps her and now he is self-reliant as he can clean and wash clothes when he travels abroad.
Moreover
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, the benefits of helping each other are not only limited to
household
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tasks
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but
also
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have a big impact on saving time.
Men
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and
women
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would often finish their work early and without effort. To illustrate, my sister has enough time to visit her relatives and shopping
due to
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her husband's help. So,
this
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can make the family more relaxed. In conclusion, boosting self-esteem, gaining many skills , being independent people and saving time are all the benefits of sharing
household
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tasks
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.
Therefore
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, the idea of depending only on
women
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should be stopped. Both males and females should have a balanced life.
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task achievement
Ensure your points are thoroughly supported with precise examples and avoid generalized statements.
coherence cohesion
Reframe the introduction to have a clearer thesis statement of the extent to which you agree or disagree from the beginning.
coherence cohesion
Work on varied sentence structure to enhance the readability of your essay. Combine shorter sentences for better flow and clarity.
coherence cohesion
Well-structured introduction and conclusion that clearly states and summarizes the main points of the essay.
task achievement
Relevant and specific examples are provided to support the argument, making the ideas more concrete and relatable.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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