The diagrams below show the life cycle of a species of large fish called the salmon. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

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A glance at the given diagrams depicts the life cycle of salmons, which are large fish that live in different habitats.

Overall

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, the life of the highlighted creature has four main steps.

In addition

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, the process of their living takes nine years.

This

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cycle starts with eggs. Actually, their life begins as eggs among reeds in upper rivers beside small stones. They stay in

this

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circumstance for approximately 5 to 6 months. After the mentioned stage, they convert to fry.

In addition

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this

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version of salmon fish has a 3 to 8cm length, and they reside in lower rivers or,

in other words

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, fast-flowing rivers.

Moreover

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this

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stage takes four years. In the third stage, they live as smolt. The smolts are wider than fry, so they are between 12 and 15cm.

Furthermore

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, the smolts live in open sea over a period of 5 years. Eventually, they convert to adult salmon in the sea.

Submitted by speher2000behroozifar on Fri Sep 20 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

154 words

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Here is the corrected version of your text:

The diagrams below show the life cycle of a species of large fish called the salmon. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

lt is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that education is important to get jobs while others believe it its experience and skills. Discuss both views and give your opinion

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sport or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend