The movement of people from agricultural areas to big cities has caused many problems at both places. What are the reasons of this problem and how can it be solved?

#movement #people #areas #cities #places

One of the significant issues today relates to the immigration of farmers from

Correct article usage

the countrysides

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countrysides

Fix the agreement mistake

countryside

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to more populated areas, which has brought

negtive

Correct your spelling

negative

impacts on both places. In

this

essay, I elaborate

the

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on the

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causes of

this

trend and how

this

should be dealt with. There are several factors which persuade citizens in rural areas to move to cities. The main one is their desire to lead a better life. When they are engaged in an agricultural industry, they have to stick to their place all the time to monitor their products.

In contrast

, if they can choose another genre of work in a city, they will have more free time to do things which add spice to life. Another justification is that they are seeking

for

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apply

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opportunities to earn money steadily. As agriculture is severely influenced by the weather, their income always fluctuates annually. To ensure their revenue, they tend to immigrate to city areas. To address

this

issue, some possible measures should be implemented. The authorities should establish a system to mitigate farmer's physical and mental burdens.

For example

, if volunteers come to their farms to cover their work, agriculturers can sustain their business.

Additionally

, they will be proud of their job. Another tactic is introducing fixing prices of their products. If they can obtain

stable

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a stable

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income regardless of the climate, they do not have to leave their homeland to secure their income. In conclusion, there

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are

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apparent reasons why farmers leave their land to cities including their wish to live a happier life and their unstable

icome

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income

due to

the weather. To alleviate

this

problem, the government should support them by creating a system to invite volunteers to help farmers and by ensuring their fluctuating

icome

Correct your spelling

income

come

Submitted by takuya13sugimoto on Sat Sep 21 2024

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Enhance your task response by providing more detailed and specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments more convincing and comprehensive.

language accuracy

Carefully proofread your essay to correct small grammatical errors and spelling mistakes, such as 'negtive' to 'negative' and 'icome' to 'income'. Proper editing can improve the overall presentation of your essay.

task achievement

You have identified clear reasons for the movement of people from agricultural areas to cities, such as the desire for a better life and stable income.

coherence clarity

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, making it easy to follow.

task achievement

You provided potential solutions to the issue, which shows thoughtful engagement with the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

287 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The movement of people from agricultural areas to big cities has caused many problems at both places. What are the reasons of this problem and how can it be solved?

Fully explain your ideas

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement

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Some people think sending criminals to prison is not an effective way to deal with them. Education and training are better. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Juvenile deliquency is on rise today. in our modern times , more and more adolescents are commiting crime. what are the possible reasons? is there any solution to this problem?