Fatherhood ought to be emphasised as much as motherhood. The idea that women are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have babies leads on to the idea that they are also responsible for bringing the children up.
Often,
women
in many countries and cultures are solely responsible for deciding whether or not to have children
, as well as
for raising them. In Colombia
, having an involved father is a rare phenomenon, which is why women
frequently take on both
roles
in single-parent families. Additionally
, births in this
country are influenced by many uncontrollable factors. In this
essay, I will explain some reasons why fathers
are not as relevant as mothers
in making these decisions
, emphasizing the case of the Colombian population.
First and foremost, in Colombia
, according to
statistics from DANE, two out of five children
live solely with their mother, which means that fatherhood does not play a significant role in their upbringing. This
absence of paternal involvement can lead to mothers
taking on both
parental roles
, managing not only the emotional and educational needs of their children
but also
the financial responsibilities. As a result
, the burden of child-rearing falls disproportionately on women
, further
reinforcing the idea that fathers
are less relevant in decision-making regarding their children
's lives. Furthermore
, societal norms and economic conditions in Colombia
may contribute to this
phenomenon, where traditional gender roles
are still prevalent, and women
are often expected to assume full responsibility for the family.
In contrast
, in a traditional family, where the father is a present figure, they can also
take part in decisions
about having children
and how to raise them. This
shared responsibility allows both
parents
to contribute equally to the child's upbringing, creating a more balanced environment where financial, emotional, and disciplinary roles
are distributed. Fathers
can offer a different perspective on child-rearing, which complements the mother's approach, potentially leading to a more comprehensive development for the children
. Additionally
, the involvement of both
parents
can provide greater stability and support for the family unit, ensuring that decisions
regarding the children
's welfare are made collaboratively and not left solely to one parent. This
dynamic can foster stronger family bonds and a more structured household.
In conclusion, the roles
of mothers
and fathers
in child-rearing can vary significantly depending on the family structure. In single-parent families, particularly in Colombia
, mothers
often bear the full responsibility of raising children
, making
critical Correct word choice
and making
decisions
on their own. This
contrasts with traditional two-parent families, where the presence of both
parents
allows for shared decision-making and a more balanced approach to child development. While
both
family structures have their challenges, the involvement of both
parents
can provide greater stability and a more comprehensive support system for the child, ultimately benefiting their overall
upbringing.Submitted by mariajoser3 on
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task achievement
Your explanation and arguments are clear and well-expressed. To further strengthen your essay, consider adding more specific data or examples to support your points.
task achievement
Ensure that your examples directly illustrate your main points to enhance the relevance and impact of your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Try to slightly improve the logical flow by ensuring each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. For instance, linking the societal norms mentioned in the first body paragraph more directly to the shared responsibilities in the second could enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and structured introduction and conclusion, which frames the discussion well.
task achievement
You effectively discuss the topic from different perspectives, providing a balanced view.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are articulated clearly and logically, making it easy for the reader to follow your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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