The increase in the number of privately-owned cars is having a negative impact on both our towns and the environment. What can individuals and the government do to reduce this problem?
It is well-known that car exhaust fumes
has
a significant impact and effect on the Change the verb form
have
encironment
. Correct your spelling
environment
This
issue
has affected not only the environment
but also
towns because of the increasing number of privately-owned
Correct your spelling
privately owned
cars
. Government
could reduce Add an article
The government
this
issue
by publish
Change the verb form
publishing
environment
protection policies and individuals could reduce this
problem by reducing carbon
footprint.55
In order to figure out the actual environmental problem Correct pronoun usage
their carbon
cause
by Wrong verb form
caused
the
private Correct article usage
apply
cars
and publish a well-developed policy, government
could organise professional Add an article
the government
people
to do some investigation and reaearch
on the roads. Correct your spelling
research
In addition
, the meteorologic laboratories could analyse data from research and use the computer to predict how much carbon
emmision
would cause air pollution. In Correct your spelling
emission
emissions
this
case, it could be more
easier for the Change the word
apply
government
to decide what measure
Fix the agreement mistake
measures
have
to Unnecessary verb
apply
do
Verb problem
take
for preventing
the aggravation of Change preposition
to prevent
air
pollution Correct article usage
the air
issue
. Furthermore
, publish
policies Wrong verb form
publishing
is
significant because Correct subject-verb agreement
are
it
could strongly restrict Correct pronoun usage
they
the
car exhaust fumes Correct article usage
apply
to affect
the Change preposition
from affecting
environment
. Additionaly
, Correct your spelling
Additionally
government
could regularly check the air quality data to consider Add an article
the government
the
better Correct article usage
apply
measure
.171
Reducing the Fix the agreement mistake
measures
carbon
footprint is an effective way for individuals to protect the environment
. Choosing the
public transportation equipped with new Correct article usage
apply
resourse
is Correct your spelling
resource
resources
becomming
more and more popular among Correct your spelling
becoming
people
these days not only because of the environmental issue
but also
to lessen the traffic pressure. This
measure helps to reduce the carbon
emmision
from Correct your spelling
emission
emissions
the
private Correct article usage
apply
cars
. In addition
, individuals could also
choose Correct article usage
a bycicle
bycicle
which is Correct your spelling
bicycle
also
a
Correct article usage
an
zero emmision
vehicle. If the destination is not far, Correct your spelling
zero-emission
people
could choose to walk there. 255
In conclusion, to reduce
the Change the verb form
reducing
emmmision
of Correct your spelling
emission
emissions
carbon
dioxide from private cars
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
the
effort from both Correct article usage
apply
government
and Correct article usage
the government
individual
. An effective and obligatory policy is crucial. Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
Besides
, it also
require
self-awareness from Change the verb form
requires
people
.Submitted by janejaspar on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay has clear and logically sequenced paragraphs. Some of your ideas can be more tightly structured for a smoother flow.
task achievement
Try to avoid minor spelling and grammatical errors (e.g., 'enciironment' should be 'environment', 'reaearch' should be 'research'). These small mistakes can distract the reader.
task achievement
Support your points with more specific examples or statistical data when possible, to make your arguments stronger.
coherence cohesion
Consider using synonyms and varying sentence structures to avoid repetition and enhance readability.
task achievement
You have covered both aspects of the question (what individuals and the government can do) comprehensively.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-framed and clearly address the essay prompt.
task achievement
The main points in your essay are mostly well-supported and relevant to the topic.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
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