IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Air pollution is currently a big issue in most industrialized cities causing respiratory problems and changes in weather patterns. What do you think are the causes of this? What measures can be taken to reduce air pollution?

#air #pollution #cities #changes #weather #patterns #measures
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It is argued that
air
pollution
 has
became
Change the form of the verb
become
show examples
 a global problem and it is considered as a main factor behind respiratory and
weather
 problems. I completely support the idea and will enlist the
causes
 and solutions in the essay. Nowadays, many industrialized countries are facing the issue of
air
pollution
. As, there are many factors that
causes
Change the verb form
cause
show examples
 the atmospheric
pollution
. First and foremost one is
insudtrial
Correct your spelling
industrial
sities
Correct your spelling
sites
cities
. Many developed nations are building more and more industries. The defusion of harmful gases from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
industries often
pollute
Change the verb form
pollutes
show examples
 the
air
. The second reason is transportation, as heavy vehicles release smoke, which is
curical
Correct your spelling
crucial
critical
 for the
air
. The third reason is
burning
Correct article usage
the burning
show examples
 of garbage openly. The smoke and dust of burning garbage
makes
Verb problem
affect
show examples
 the atmosphere
effected
Verb problem
apply
show examples
.
However
, these factors of
air
pollution
also
 affect the health of human beings. It
causes
 many diseases like cancer,
problem
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
show examples
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
taking breath, coughing, asthma and many other skin diseases as well.
Along with
 it
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
show examples
 in
weather
 conditions like
Correct article usage
the distruction
show examples
distruction
Correct your spelling
destruction
 of
ozone
Add an article
the ozone
show examples
 layer and increase in temperature
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 been observed.
Moreover
, it is said that if nations will not take
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
proper action on time,
than
Replace the word
then
show examples
 the world will become a miserable place to live. The states should take measures to reduce
air
pollution
 to save the world from a disaster.
For instance
, the
leaderships
Fix the agreement mistake
leadership
show examples
 should make
such
Fix the agreement mistake
apply
show examples
laws through which the industries will only be allowed to release certain
amout
Correct your spelling
amount
amounts
 of gases. Even the
authorties
Correct your spelling
authorities
 should
bane
Correct your spelling
ban
show examples
 private cars and ask their people to use public transportation, which will reduce the number of cars on the road and less smoke will be released.
Instead
 of burning garbage, it should be pressed in
depth
Add an article
the depth
show examples
 of
ground
Add an article
the ground
show examples
. Even the
managment
Correct your spelling
management
 should lessen the use of plastic in their territory.
Furthermore
, the
authorties
Correct your spelling
authorities
 should introduce schemes of
plantation
Add an article
the plantation
a plantation
show examples
, in which
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 will be asked to grow trees to make their environment green, which will maintain the temperature and
weather
 of the globe.
To conclude
, it is proven from the above essay that
air
pollution
causes
 many respiratory and
weather
 problems and it is in the
hand
Fix the agreement mistake
hands
show examples
 of
a nations
Correct the article-noun agreement
nations
a nation
show examples
 to adopt
such
messures
Correct your spelling
measures
 to overcome
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air
pollution
 and make the world
healthier
Correct article usage
a healthier
show examples
 place to live.
Submitted by hadiyanasir73 on

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grammar
Work on reducing grammar and spelling mistakes. For example, correct 'became' to 'become' and 'insudtrial' to 'industrial.'
examples
To strengthen the argument, add more specific examples and data points. This will make your essay more impressive and convincing.
sentence structure
Be cautious with your sentence structures to avoid run-on sentences. Split them into smaller sentences for better readability.
structure
You have provided a clear introduction and conclusion which frame the essay well.
content
The essay identifies several key causes of air pollution and proposes several measures to reduce it, showing a good understanding of the topic.
transition
The transitions between points are generally smooth, helping the flow of the essay.
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