In most countries, prison is an effective solution for the problem of crime. Some people think a more effective solution is to provide a better education. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays, many solutions for the problem of crime
had
been proposed, Wrong verb form
have
all
Correct word choice
and all
goal
of solutions are Fix the agreement mistake
goals
seek
a better way to deal with crime events. One of them is to provide a better Fix the infinitive
to seek
education
,
and make Remove the comma
apply
convict
reformed and return to society. Fix the agreement mistake
convicts
This
essay will discuss the reasons why I agree provide
a better Add the particle
to provide
education
.
On the one hand, provide
a better Wrong verb form
providing
education
can reduce the chance of recommitment
. For example
, some countries provid
Correct your spelling
provide
a
Correct article usage
apply
education
instead
of prison
demonstrates
that Wrong verb form
demonstrating
provide
a better Wrong verb form
providing
education
can still be considered as
an effective solution. Change preposition
apply
This
suggests that supply
a better Wrong verb form
supplying
education
can led
to positive Change the verb form
lead
be led
result
because of Fix the agreement mistake
results
recommitment
decreased. Therefore
, it is clear that
provide
a better Wrong verb form
providing
education
plays a crucial role in recommitment
Correct article usage
the recommitment
rate
.
Moreover
, some education
provide
Change the verb form
provides
a
occupational training for misdemeanor Remove the article
apply
criminal
. Fix the agreement mistake
criminals
For instance
, some prison
provide Fix the agreement mistake
prisons
a
vocational training to Remove the article
apply
thief
and hope Fix the agreement mistake
thieves
them
can Correct pronoun usage
they
had
a skill to Change the verb form
have
survival
without stealing. Replace the word
survive
This
suggests that supply
Wrong verb form
supplying
a
occupational training can Correct article usage
apply
led
to constructive Change the verb form
lead
be led
result
because Fix the agreement mistake
results
of
Change preposition
apply
ex-thief
no longer Fix the agreement mistake
ex-thiefs
to
live on stealing. Fix the infinitive
apply
Therefore
, it is clear that
provide
Wrong verb form
providing
a
vocational training is given Correct article usage
apply
a
paramount importance Remove the article
apply
of
decreasing Change preposition
in
recommitment
Correct article usage
the recommitment
rate
.
In conclusion, provide
a better Wrong verb form
providing
education
can be regard
as a Change the form of the verb
regarded
cutting edge
solution, based on many benefits, Add a hyphen
cutting-edge
such
as decreasing recommitment
rate
. By provide
a better Wrong verb form
Providing
education
for criminal
, Fix the agreement mistake
criminals
and
evidence shows Correct word choice
apply
it
is Correct pronoun usage
apply
more
effective solution than Correct article usage
a more
prison
. Ultimately, many prison
Change to a plural noun
prisons
start
to reform and more Wrong verb form
have started
prison
Fix the agreement mistake
prisons
likely
to offer Add a missing verb
are likely
a
Correct article usage
apply
education
for Add an article
a misdemeanor
misdemeanor
Fix the agreement mistake
misdemeanors
,
and Remove the comma
apply
reduced
Wrong verb form
reduce
recommitment
rate
in future.Fix the agreement mistake
rates
Submitted by hibana2077 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
complete response
Make sure to fully expand on your main points with clear, detailed explanations. For instance, explain more about how education reduces recidivism rates and provide more specific examples or studies to support your argument.
clear comprehensive ideas
Ensure that your ideas are presented clearly and comprehensively. Avoid vague expressions and ensure that each sentence contributes to the overall argument.
relevant specific examples
Include more specific and relevant examples to support your points. This not only strengthens your argument but also shows your ability to use evidence effectively.
logical structure
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which enhances readability.
introduction conclusion present
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed, reinforcing the essay’s overall argument.
supported main points
You provide clear reasons for your viewpoint, such as the role of education in reducing recommitment rates and providing occupational training.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!