Some people think that parents should teach their children how to be good members of society. Others, however, believe that school is the best place to learn this. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Some people argue that
children
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should be taught by their
parents
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how to become valuable members of society. Others suggest that it is the
schools
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, where they should learn
this
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.
While
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parents
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instil foundational values in their
children
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, I believe that
schools
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provide a more practical
approach
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for
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to
show examples
learning
this
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.
Children
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, from an early age, are taught how to behave with others by their
parents
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. Because they are always with their
children
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,
parents
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know how their
children
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react to certain situations.
Therefore
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, they can guide them
accordingly
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and teach them basic manners and principles, which is a personalized
approach
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.
For example
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,
children
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when allowed to take care of a family pet, get to understand that their actions affect other living beings too, thereby learning how to be responsible.
However
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, I believe that
this
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may
also
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create bias in their
children
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's minds because they learn only one point of view. Universities have a more realistic
approach
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of
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to
show examples
educating their students with moral and ethical values.
Schools
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, normally, have certain projects that require group participation, thereby teaching
children
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teamwork and compassion, which are essential traits to become valuable citizens.
For instance
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, St. Xavier’s Institution, a school in Kolkata, India, has mandatory community service programs, where the students visit the local orphanages to donate their old books.
Therefore
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, I am of the opinion that
schools
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provide a more realistic setting to educate young students with moral principles. In conclusion,
parents
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know their
children
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better and can guide them to become better human beings through a personalized method.
However
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, educational institutions have curriculums in place that teach
children
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to be better individuals through a practical
approach
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, making it the best place for learning societal values.
Submitted by majumdarnilesh21 on

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task achievement
The introduction is clear and presents both viewpoints effectively. However, consider elaborating slightly more on your own opinion to make it even clearer.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical progression throughout, and each paragraph flows well into the next. Still, work on having more explicit transitional phrases to enhance cohesion.
task achievement
Examples given are relevant and support the arguments well. A bit more detail on the counter-argument would strengthen your response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that every main point discussed finds closure within the paragraph. Also, check to make sure that no meaningful points are left underdeveloped.
coherence cohesion
Strong introduction and conclusion that effectively summarize the main ideas discussed.
task achievement
Clear and comprehensive ideas presented throughout. The essay effectively covers both views and provides a well-reasoned opinion.
task achievement
Relevant and specific examples are used to support the main points, making the argument more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Good logical structure, making it easy for the reader to follow the argument.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
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