Some people state arts courses such painting or drawing should not be made compulsory for high school students .To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #arts #courses #school #students

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Art

is an inseparable part of human existence;

therefore

, it is

also

a part of a high school programme.

However

, there is still a lack of consensus on whether it should be compulsory or not.

While

each of these views has both pros and cons, I believe that arts courses should be obligatory for all students. There have been many benefits of learning about the

art

. First and foremost, it allows you to deepen your knowledge about the history of humankind.

Art

has been made by humans since our origin thousands of years ago - it presents different epochs, beliefs, and socio-political situations of our ancestors, thereby, it is a great subject to study in order to understand our past.

Furthermore

, it

also

enables getting to know the human mind in a more complex way.

Art

not only

does

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

presents the past, but

also

expresses the feelings and thoughts of its creators;

consequently

, constituting a unique way to gain a better knowledge of our minds.

On the other hand

, relevant drawbacks of

such

an approach are visible too. The most significant of them is that the

art

can be hard to understand. Not all students feel the

art

thus

, for some of them, it may be boring and unessential.

Additionally

, it is another subject about which teenagers have to learn. The educational programme is already full of unnecessary stuff and

art

, since it is not as important as

for instance

mathematics, can boost the feeling of being overwhelmed

as well as

consume the time that students can spend learning about more important subjects. In conclusion, compulsory arts classes in a high school have both advantages and disadvantages. The most significant benefit of them is the fact that

art

can contribute to deepening teenagers' knowledge of history and humans, which I believe is very profitable.

In contrast

, it possesses

also

relevant weaknesses in the form of being hard to understand and time-consuming.

Submitted by kuba.glogowski on Tue Sep 24 2024

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relevant specific examples

While the essay successfully addresses both sides of the argument, including more specific examples or case studies would strengthen the argument further. Try to provide real-life illustrations or data to substantiate your points.

logical structure

To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider using more transitional phrases. Words like 'conversely', 'for instance', or 'moreover' can help create smoother transitions between ideas and paragraphs, making your essay easier to follow.

introduction conclusion present

The essay demonstrates a clear structure with a well-defined introduction, main body, and conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a specific point, aiding readability and comprehension.

clear comprehensive ideas

Clear, comprehensive ideas are presented throughout the essay. Your points are relevant and explore both sides of the debate, demonstrating a balanced perspective.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

321 words

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Some people state arts courses such painting or drawing should not be made compulsory for high school students .To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

-A lot of money is spent nowadays searching for oil. As the world's oil resources will eventually run out, it would be more logical to spend some of this money on developing new sources of power, such as wind and solar. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many professional sports, there is an increase in the number of athletes using banned substances to improve their performance. What are the causes of the phenomenon and what are some of the possible solutions?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?