Some people think computer and internet are important in children's study , but other think students can learn effectively in school and with teachers . Discuss both sides and give your own opinion

A downright variance of view has been observed among the masses regarding effective tools for studies. A segment of the society contends that having instructive guidance
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
vitally important for adults for their academic work,opponents meanwhile,adhere to the notion of utilization of
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
for the same agenda.The ensuing paragraphs will proffer an insight into both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
doctrines and explain
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
why it is important to
considering
Wrong verb form
consider
show examples
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
for their academic work acts as
foster
Correct word choice
a fostering
show examples
tool to learn about studies Not endorsed by everyone,yet approved by some individuals that
relying
Wrong verb form
rely
show examples
on
tutors
Change noun form
tutors'
tutor's
show examples
guideness
Correct your spelling
guides
consider
Wrong verb form
considered
show examples
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
effective tool to master their skills.To expand
this
idea,
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
tutors are
usally
Correct your spelling
usually
role
model
Fix the agreement mistake
models
show examples
for their students,as they are experienced and experts in studies,which
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
are learning,
moreover
,as individuals are directly connected with their instructors,
as a result
,they can clear their doubts without having any fear .
On the other hand
,
school
Correct article usage
the school
show examples
environment under
educators
Change noun form
educators'
educator's
show examples
guideness
Correct your spelling
guides
provides
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
environment of learning ,which boasts their motivation and focus. Disjunctive to
this
, the idea of
utilization
Replace the word
utilising
show examples
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
act
Correct subject-verb agreement
acts
show examples
as a more beneficial tool which is attested by myriads of people.The
foundamental
Correct your spelling
fundamental
element associated with
this
mechanism is the advantage of easy access,as students don't have to join any academy,since, they can search
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
thier
Correct your spelling
their
doubts on
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
,as their a lot of information which is present on
google
Capitalize word
Google
show examples
,YouTube and other social platforms.Another worth-considering element analogous to the idea of
vast
Correct article usage
a vast
show examples
of informative documentaries,
reasearches
Correct your spelling
research
which are posted on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
by various experts
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
present.
For instance
,my cousin who
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
top in his class,by asking,I
come
Wrong verb form
came
show examples
to know he use various online methods for improving his
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
,
such
as watching YouTube videos
for understanding
Change preposition
to understand
show examples
topics and using
goagle
Change the capitalization
Goagle
show examples
for making assignments.
To conclude
, both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
arguments carry their own reasoning,logic and pragmatism.
Albiet
Correct your spelling
Albeit
,relying on
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
seems advantageous in the long run
due to
its weighty,indispensable and fringe benefits.
Submitted by notkhan01 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Work on the logical structure of your essay. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and logically flows to the next. Consider using transitional phrases to link ideas smoothly.
task achievement
Provide more specific and detailed examples for your main points. Highlight key points more clearly and ensure that examples are directly related to those points.
task achievement
Proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure. For instance, avoid run-on sentences and ensure proper subject-verb agreement.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps frame your discussion well.
task achievement
You have attempted to present and discuss both viewpoints effectively, which is crucial for task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion provides a clear stance on the topic, summarizing your main argument effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • digital literacy
  • educational resources
  • interactive educational tools
  • personalized learning
  • immediate feedback
  • structured environment
  • social interaction
  • overall development
  • physical resources
  • practical learning
What to do next:
Look at other essays: