The charts below give information about the amount of electricity used. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#information #amount #electricity #summarise #features #comparisons

The bar chart above depicts information about

total

Add an article

the total

show examples

amount of

electricity

used

while

the line graph illustrates the daily demand for

electricity

Overall

, it can be seen that both of them show totally different data.

Furthermore

, the daily demand for

electricity

in winter is higher than in summer. Meanwhile, people

most

Correct your spelling

mostly

show examples

used

Wrong verb form

use

show examples

it for heating rooms or heating water.

Firstly

, the number of units of

electricity

that used during

winter

Add an article

the winter

show examples

season was fluctuated. It

was

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

started with more than 30000

then

ease

Wrong verb form

eased

show examples

decreasedand

Correct your spelling

decreased and

decreased

jump

Wrong verb form

jumped

show examples

again. Even, the range was about 30000 until 49000. On the other side, in summer, people only need around 10000 up to 20000 per day for

electricity

Secondly

, half of the bar chart was dominated by heating rooms and heating water.

Moreover

, 17.5 per cent

from

Change preposition

show examples

100 per cent was

alocated

Correct your spelling

allocated

for ovens, kettles, and washing machines. After that, the rest of it was saved for lighting, TV, radio, vacuum cleaners, food mixers,

electric

Correct word choice

and electric

show examples

tools. Respectively, 15 per cent.

Submitted by wishmeluck on Wed Sep 25 2024

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words electricity with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

164 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Electricity consumption
Kilowatt-hours (kWh)
Energy demand
Power grid
Renewable energy sources
Non-renewable energy sources
Sustainable consumption
Conservation efforts
Industrial sector
Residential sector
Commercial sector
Fluctuation
Year-over-year comparison
Efficiency improvements
Seasonal variation

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The charts below give information about the amount of electricity used. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Millions of people every year move to English-speaking countries such as Australia, Britain or America, in order to study at school, college or university. Why do so many people want to study in English? Why is English such an important international language? Give reasons for your answer.

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities , so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

Some parents say that children should play individually more than in a group. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and include your own opinion.