As the result of tourisms and the incresing number of people traveling, there's an growing demand for more flights. What problems does it have on the enviroment? What measures could be taken to solve the problem?

Rising
Correct article usage
The rising
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demand
of
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for
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people
travelling has affected a number of
flights
.
However
, the significant
demand
of
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for
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flights
might cause some environmental problems,
such
as air pollution which should be encountered by some solutions which will be examined in
this
essay. First of all, a massive
demand
of
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for
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flights
will cause more air pollution because plane releases the highest amount of carbon emissions per
passengers
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passenger
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, compared to buses or trains.
This
is because most of
planes
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the planes
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, particularly on commercial
planes
, are still using fossil fuels as their primary resources. Even though some researchers have
taken
Verb problem
done
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some
researches
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research
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on electric
planes
or
by
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apply
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using other sustainable fuels, the
aircrafts
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aircraft
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are quite difficult to
be converted
Wrong verb form
convert
show examples
due to
many
constrains
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constraints
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that affect
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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safety,
such
as minimum weights and battery capacity.
Therefore
, in order to solve the problem, the government should take an important role by encouraging
people
to choose other clean transportation modes,
such
as trains and electric buses. By giving some incentives and campaigns, tourists will tend to choose other transportation modes.
Furthermore
, the government can encourage
people
to go
their
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to their
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local travel destinations.
As a result
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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tourists do not have to travel by
planes
Fix the agreement mistake
plane
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and choose their local destinations to travel.
Furthermore
,
this
solution will
also
have positive impacts
to
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on
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the economy of local communities. In conclusion, a significant
demand
of
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for
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flights
will have negative impacts on
environment
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the environment
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because
majority
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the majority
a majority
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of
planes
are still using fossil fuels that release high
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
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of carbon emissions.
Hence
, the
goverment
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government
should take some
actions
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action
show examples
by encouraging
people
to use other cleaner
transportations
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transportation
show examples
and promote their local destinations to reduce travelling.
Submitted by bhaswarawira on

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task achievement
Your response to the task is clear and comprehensive, but you could further improve by providing more examples and details to support your main points. This would give the reader more concrete evidence of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Try to vary your sentence structure and make use of complex sentences to enhance the readability and flow of your essay. This can help in making your argument more compelling and engaging.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-presented and give a clear framework to your essay. This helps in providing a logical structure to your argument.
task achievement
You have addressed both parts of the question effectively, offering a clear response to the environmental problems associated with increased flights and suggesting viable solutions.
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