Some people think traffic and housing problems in big cities can be solved by moving companies and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

#people #traffic #cities #companies #employees #countryside

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The advancement of technologies and globalization has

lead

Wrong verb form

led

show examples

establishment

Add an article

the establishment

show examples

of more

companies

Use synonyms

and industries.

Therefore

Linking Words

, many

people

Use synonyms

think

traffic

Use synonyms

and housing problems in big

cities

Use synonyms

can be solved by moving

companies

Use synonyms

and their employees to the

countryside

Use synonyms

. I agree,

Use synonyms

traffic

Correct word choice

that traffic

show examples

and housing problems in big

cities

Use synonyms

can be solved by supporting the above statement. In

Use synonyms

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

countryside

Add a comma

countryside,

show examples

there is abundant space and

surrounding

Replace the word

surroundings

show examples

for new or existing

companies

Use synonyms

move

Use synonyms

and re-establish. There won't be any competition as

compare

Change the form of the verb

compared

show examples

cities

Use synonyms

Companies

Use synonyms

can run as a monopoly.

Thus

Linking Words

, they can

contrpl

Correct your spelling

control

the market's demand and supply. In

Use synonyms

cities

Add a comma

cities,

show examples

there is

scarcity

Add an article

a scarcity

the scarcity

show examples

of employees.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, in

Use synonyms

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

too, there

Change the verb form

are

show examples

lots of educated

people

Use synonyms

who are short of good opportunities. In

Use synonyms

cities

Add a comma

cities,

show examples

there is

scarcity

Add an article

a scarcity

the scarcity

show examples

of water, space and other

necesary

Correct your spelling

necessary

resources. The current problem

companies

Use synonyms

are facing is the housing crisis.

Due to

Linking Words

out-large of employees,

people

Use synonyms

are not finding

suitbale

Correct your spelling

suitable

house to

accomodate

Correct your spelling

accommodate

Nontheless

Correct your spelling

Nonetheless

this

Linking Words

can be

sloved

Correct your spelling

solved

companies

Use synonyms

move

Use synonyms

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

. Sometimes houses are un-occupied as most of the

people

Use synonyms

live in big

cities

Use synonyms

. It''s an advantage for both the

companies

Use synonyms

and the

people

Use synonyms

living in rural areas. As the

Use synonyms

countryside

Add a comma

countryside,

show examples

people

Use synonyms

can earn

move

Use synonyms

through the company's employee in

a reasonable rates

Correct the article-noun agreement

reasonable rates

a reasonable rate

show examples

Subsequently

Linking Words

, there will be

decrease

Correct article usage

a decrease

show examples

in air pollution leading to a healthy

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

. There will be less

traffic

Use synonyms

conjuction

Correct your spelling

congestion

Companies

Use synonyms

who

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

are

non- profitable

Correct word choice

non-profit

show examples

organisation

Fix the agreement mistake

organisations

show examples

NGO

Fix the agreement mistake

NGOs

show examples

sustainable

Add a missing verb

are sustainable

show examples

energy based

Add a hyphen

energy-based

show examples

. It can greatly

benift

Correct your spelling

benefit

the

countryside

Use synonyms

people

Use synonyms

who are deprived of

opportunites

Correct your spelling

opportunities

opportunity

. Their children can go to school with the help of

such

Linking Words

companies

Use synonyms

Companies

Use synonyms

moving to

Use synonyms

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

can create a chain of

employement opportunites

Correct your spelling

employment opportunities

. There will

technology

Replace the word

be technological

show examples

advancement and liberalization. All in all, It's

Change the article

show examples

great

move

Use synonyms

if the

comapnies

Correct your spelling

companies

move

Use synonyms

countryside

Correct article usage

the countryside

show examples

as it will create less

traffic

Use synonyms

conjuction

Correct your spelling

congestion

and

housing

Correct article usage

a housing

show examples

crisis. On the other side,

It's

Verb problem

show examples

will

immensly

Correct your spelling

greatly

benifit

Correct your spelling

benefit

benefits

the

people

Use synonyms

living in

Use synonyms

countryside

Add an article

the countryside

show examples

Hence

Linking Words

, it's a win-win

sitution

Correct your spelling

situation

for both.

However

Linking Words

, there might be some negative

impact

Fix the agreement mistake

impacts

show examples

too if big

companies

Use synonyms

moves

Change the verb form

move

show examples

Linking Words

Nevertheless

Add a comma

Nevertheless,

show examples

Change the capitalization

show examples

will

agree

Add the preposition

agree on

agree to

agree with

show examples

the statement firmly.

Submitted by ugyenyangzom42 on Thu Sep 26 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Your response to the task is fairly comprehensive and addresses most aspects of the prompt. However, including more specific examples and evidence to support your arguments would strengthen your essay.

coherence and cohesion

There are a few grammatical errors and some awkward phrasing. For instance, 'out-large of employees' could be 'large number of employees' and 'conjuction' should be 'congestion'. Working on these aspects can improve the clarity of your writing.

introduction and conclusion

Your introduction and conclusion are well-crafted, providing a clear stance and summary.

task achievement

You effectively discuss various benefits of moving companies to the countryside, such as reducing pollution and creating employment opportunities.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
51
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

340 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some people believe that longer prison sentences are the best way to reduce crime while others believe that there are alternative ways to decrease crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion
People have different views about whether the best way to reduce crime by the perpetrators is by extending their punishment period or by finding other alternative approaches instead. while extended periods of punishment can sometimes be useful for them to realize what they have done to be in such a place, In my opinion, providing them the alternative approaches like psychological counselling would help them to be a good person in society.
7.5
band
The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?
The work-life balance in the twenty-first century is a trending and controversial issue among entrepreneurs and business owners as well as labour associations and organised unions worldwide. Many, myself included, advocate that weekly career times ought to be reduced and a more generous time off for employees should be granted for several beneficial reasons on both sides of the argument.
8
band
Health and fitness levels of children and teenagers are declining these days. Therefore, physical education and sport should be compulsory for all students in all schools. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is often argued that these days youth's immune system is declining so schools should mandatory subjects like physical education and sport.This essay agrees with this statement as it will make them physically active and allow them to explore new fields.
7.5
band
Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
It has become an increasingly heated topic for the government to allocate funds in space exploration with many commentators suggesting that they should invest in the country's development to create beneficial advantages to the nation. I would agree with this and provide an effective way to allocate this money.
7.5
band
In some culture children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disavdantages of giving children this message?
Nowadays, in some countries, parents assume that if kids try hard, they will be able to achieve their goals properly. In the forthcoming paragraphs, I shall elaborate on the pros and cons of this matter.

Some people think traffic and housing problems in big cities can be solved by moving companies and their employees to the countryside. Do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that longer prison sentences are the best way to reduce crime while others believe that there are alternative ways to decrease crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion

The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend. Do you agree or disagree?

Health and fitness levels of children and teenagers are declining these days. Therefore, physical education and sport should be compulsory for all students in all schools. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some culture children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disavdantages of giving children this message?