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Band 5.5

Some people believe that children should not be given homework every day, while others believe that they must get homework every day in order to be successful at school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #homework #school
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The
school
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 absorbs a lot of
time
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, not only in the form of classes
,
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apply
show examples
 but
also
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 in the meaning of
preparation
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preparing
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to
Change preposition
for
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 it at home.
As a result
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, there
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 been an increase in the number of voices which claim that
homework
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 should not be given every day.
However
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, other people believe that it is a good way to mobilize kids to work and study,
therefore
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, should be
geven
Correct your spelling
given
 daily. Each
ot
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of
 these approaches
have
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has
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 both pros and cons. Preparation for
the
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apply
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school
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 at home is a significant step
of
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in
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 gaining the
knowlegde
Correct your spelling
knowledge
. First and foremost, it forces
schoolkids
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school kids
show examples
 to learn and exercise.
For instance
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, it is much more developing for children to practice their
school
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 subject in
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 free
time
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, rather than play on the computer.
Furthermore
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, the
homework
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 allows students to get a better understanding of things they are learning in the
school
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. In order to get a good mark, children have to understand the topic,
thus
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, it is more beneficial for them to
spnd
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spend
send
the
Correct article usage
apply
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time
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 at home
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
 and trying to become better.
On the other hand
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, there have been
also
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 relevant drawbacks
of
Change preposition
to
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such
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 an approach. The best example
for
Change preposition
of
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this
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 is the fact that children can feel overwhelmed because of the number of work that
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 to be done by them. In fact, kids are already tired after
the
Correct article usage
apply
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school
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, so they appreciate
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time
Add an article
the time
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 to relax.
In addition
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, a lack of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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homework
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 can allow
schoolkids
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school kids
show examples
 to develop their passions. The free
time
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 they gain can be devoted to other activities or hobbies,
consequently
Linking Words
 boosting their skills. In conclusion, in my
opinion
Add a comma
opinion,
show examples
 it is better to limit the number of
the
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apply
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homework
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.
Although
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 it may have a positive impact on students'
school
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 grades, their
limitation
Fix the agreement mistake
limitations
show examples
 can allow them to relax and develop their passions, which I believe is more advantageous.
Submitted by kuba.glogowski on

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coherence cohesion
Try to ensure consistency in your ideas throughout the essay.
task achievement
Work on grammar and spelling accuracy to make your essay more polished.
task achievement
Consider including more specific examples to support your points. This can make your argument more compelling.
coherence cohesion
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame your essay well.
task achievement
Both views are discussed, and your opinion is clearly stated.
coherence cohesion
Your essay presents a balanced discussion of the topic, which is a strong point.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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