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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows percentages of young people choosing different ways to solve the global warming in four different countries in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows percentages of young people choosing different ways to solve the global warming in four different countries in 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#percentages #people #four #countries #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar chart illustrates the data about the chosen ways ,including
life style
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lifestyle
show examples
,
govermment
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government
 regulations , advanced technology and none of these, by four countries' children to
overcom
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overcome
 global warming in 2008.
Overall
Linking Words
, remarkable information can be observed,
in
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with
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 Portugal showing the highest percentage across all categories compared to other countries,
while
Linking Words
Romania
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 shows average percentages. Poland and the Holand each have the second-highest proportion in two different categories. In the category of "Lifestyle," Portugal had the highest proportion at around 40%, followed by Poland at approximately 30%. Meanwhile,
Romania
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 and the Netherlands showed lower percentages, with
Romania
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just
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at just
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 over 20% and the Netherlands at about 10%.
This
Linking Words
 pattern is
similarly
Linking Words
 reflected in the "Government Regulations" category.
In contrast
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, in the category of "Advanced Technology," Portugal maintained its dominance with over 35%,
while
Linking Words
 the Netherlands came in second with about 30%, marking a significant increase compared to the other categories. Poland and
Romania
Use synonyms
,
on the other hand
Linking Words
, had much lower percentages, each below 20%.
Submitted by kwakjim777 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words romania with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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