Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

It is undeniable that in
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
modern days,
techonology
Correct your spelling
technology
has been a big help to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. Some
people
believe
technology
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
positive effects for
people
.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
others
also
believe that
technology
also
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
some negative
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
to
people
.
This
essay will try to explain both sides. First of all, in
this
modern era,
people
can not
detached
Change the verb form
be detached
detach
show examples
from the usage of
technology
, especially the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
.
People
, in any part of the globe
use
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
to support nearly all of their daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
For example
, workers
use
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
to finish their tasks and students
use
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
to study and
looking
Wrong verb form
look
show examples
for
informations
Change the wording
information
pieces of information
show examples
. In short,
technology
has been a part of
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
daily
life
.
However
, despite the benefits of
technology
, it
also
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
some drawbacks. Because of the advancement of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
, some users of
technology
have been using it to
inflicting
Wrong verb form
inflict
show examples
harm
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
others.
For example
, there are some
people
who
use
the
internet
as a
mean
Fix the agreement mistake
means
show examples
to scam someone to get some easy money. In brief, the
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
and
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
of
technology
are depend
Change the verb form
depend
show examples
on the user. Another problem
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
technology
is that not all
people
can afford it.
This
happen
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
because when
develope
Correct your spelling
develop
developing
an equipment
Remove the article
equipment
a piece of equipment
show examples
, the developer
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
many things and workers,
not to mention
upgrading the equipment.
Develope
Correct your spelling
Developing
a phone,
for instance
,
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
show examples
a lot of components and technicians to
planning
Replace the word
plan
show examples
and
assembling
Wrong verb form
assemble
show examples
it until it
arrive
Change the verb form
arrives
show examples
to customers.
To conclude
,
technology
can only
use
Wrong verb form
be used
show examples
by some exclusive
people
. In conclusion,
technology
, especially the
internet
has become a part of
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
daily
life
in
this
modern era.
However
, not all
people
have good
intention
Fix the agreement mistake
intentions
show examples
when using it,
thus
it
is depending
Wrong verb form
depends
show examples
on the user of the
technology
to determine if the
advacement
Correct your spelling
advancement
of
technology
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
positive or negative impacts in
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
life
.
Submitted by anandeaadhity on

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coherence cohesion
Improve the logical flow between paragraphs to ensure smooth transitions and better cohesion.
task achievement
Include more relevant and specific examples to strongly support your main points.
task achievement
Expand ideas more comprehensively, ensuring all aspects of the question are addressed clearly.
general
Pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure to enhance clarity and professionalism.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion, which frame the discussion well.
task achievement
The author acknowledges both the positive and negative impacts of technology, demonstrating a balanced perspective.

Your opinion

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Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • remote work
  • e-learning
  • accessibility
  • inclusive
  • productivity
  • personalized learning
  • disciplined routine
  • interpersonal skills
  • cybersecurity
  • sustainability
  • work-life balance
  • physical disabilities
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