IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

In some countries, it is becoming increasingly common for people to follow a vegetarian diet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

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Increasingly, vegetarian diets are being commonly followed by people in some nations.
Although
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such
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 a development discourages animal cruelty , I believe that the drawbacks outweigh the benefits because it reduces the
protein
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 supply to the body. Following a vegetarian
diet
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,
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apply
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 helps spread more awareness about animal cruelty in slaughterhouses, leading to its discouragement. Social media plays a key role in
this
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 case as many content creators and influencers prefer vegetarian dishes over other cuisines.
This
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 lowers the demand for non-vegetarian foods, which results in less production of animal meat.
For example
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, a recent study on Southeast Asians by the University of Cambridge stated that more young non-vegetarians are shifting to a vegan
diet
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 because of the disturbing contents of the butcher shops they view on Twitter.
However
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, I believe
such
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 a
diet
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 choice is not beneficial for people’s
health
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 in the long run. With increased adoption of the vegetarian
diet
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,
protein
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 intake required by the body for muscle building is reduced.
Therefore
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, existing muscles tend to get weaker because growth is being prevented by a low
protein
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 supply.
Moreover
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, skeletal muscles required to hold the bones strongly weaken over time.
This
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, if not checked, gives rise to orthopaedic ailments and leads to a decline in
health
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.
For instance
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, it is recommended by
health
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 experts to include lean
protein
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, available from chicken meat, in meals to develop chest muscles, which protects the heart.
Therefore
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, I’m of the opinion that ignoring lean
protein
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 sources and only eating a vegetarian
diet
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 has dire consequences on people’s
health
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. In conclusion,
although
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 eating vegetarian foods helps increase awareness about animal cruelty, one must take into account that consuming only vegetarian dishes prevents one from getting essential proteins required by the human body to maintain its
health
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. For these reasons, the negatives outweigh the positives.

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task response
Expand on the disadvantages of a vegetarian diet to provide a more balanced discussion. Including counterarguments and addressing them can help in developing a comprehensive response.
coherence and cohesion
Work on transitions between ideas to create a smoother flow. Using connecting words and phrases will enhance the readability and coherence.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion that summarize the main argument effectively.
task response
Relevant specific examples, such as the University of Cambridge study, help to illustrate and support the main points effectively.
coherence and cohesion
Main points are clearly expressed and logically structured, making it easy for the reader to follow the argument.

Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Vegetarian diet
  • Chronic diseases
  • Carbon footprint
  • Deforestation
  • Animal welfare
  • Nutritional deficiencies
  • Balanced intake
  • Societal norms
  • Meat-dominant
  • Sustainable living
  • Plant-based proteins
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