Some species of animals are almost extinct; and many others seem to be fast approaching a similar risk. What are the reasons for this? What should be done to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 words.

Animals
far beyond the time of human existence have lived on the. planet Earth.
However
, over time, these
animals
are no longer extant
due to
multi-faceted causes ceasing them to live in newer centuries environment.
Animals
such
as dinosaurs,
mammoth
Fix the agreement mistake
mammoths
show examples
, and other creatures have extinct, are we going to allow more of these poor creatures to
also
vanish from the globe's surface
due to
human misconduct? What are the particular reasons for
this
occurrence and what can civilisation do to avert
this
crux? Right off the bat, it is crystal clear that climatory changes have affected the Earth's geographical state, which caused many
animals
to be forced out of their habitats.
For instance
,
due to
extreme heat in Antarctica, the melting of thick glaciers over a depth of over 1 meter has been reported. Ice-aged
animals
are unable to withstand the uprising heat, causing them to die
due to
internal factors. Inevitably,
this
is a result of the greenhouse effect by mankind; the emission of chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs).
Therefore
, it is the people's duty to minimise the utilisation of electronics that cause the release of additional heat by those gases. Other than that, another man-made effect of extinction is illegal logging. Obviously, private companies harvest logs of wood to gain an incredible amount of profit as they are gluttonous.
Nevertheless
,
this
self-righteous doing causes more harm to habitats in the jungle, especially to
animals
that depend on trees for shelter. Alternatively, the nation's government should carry out new legislation for illegal logging, to ensure
this
activity is exacerbated,and a stricter penalty should be implemented on the perpetrator and their company.
As a result
, less unmonitored and unapproved logging will take place domestically. In conclusion, an intervention to mitigate animal extinction is paramount, as more innocent creature's lives are at stake.
That is
why humans need to shift paradigms and use a multi-faceted approach as it is indispensable in creating a harmonious habitat for our lovely creatures.
Additionally
, the combined synergies of the contemporary citizens and their government are substantial in order to wholly curb
this
stringent issue
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task achievement
The essay should provide more specific examples to support the arguments made. For instance, while illegal logging is mentioned, details about specific regions or cases would make the argument stronger.
coherence cohesion
While the organization of the essay is generally good, some sentences could be more concisely written. For example, the sentence, 'Ice-aged animals are unable to withstand the uprising heat, causing them to die due to internal factors,' could be simplified for clarity.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear and compelling introduction and conclusion, which enhances readability and ensures all key points are addressed.
coherence cohesion
The arguments are generally well-structured, and there is a logical flow between different sections of the essay, which makes it easier for readers to follow.
task achievement
The essay demonstrates clear, comprehensive ideas on the causes and solutions for animal extinction, showing a deep understanding of the topic.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • species extinction
  • endangered animals
  • biodiversity
  • habitat loss
  • deforestation
  • urbanization
  • poaching
  • illegal wildlife trade
  • climate change
  • pollution
  • conservation efforts
  • legislation
  • enforcement
  • human overpopulation
  • sustainable development
  • responsible consumption
  • education
  • awareness programs
  • protected areas
  • wildlife reserves
  • international cooperation
  • collaboration
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