IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Write an email to a manager hotel expressing a bad experience in a hotel. mention the following points: describe the details of the experience, ask for a compensation somehow and suggest recommendations to improve

#email #manager #hotel #points #compensation #recommendations
Dear Manager, I am writing
this
 email to bring your attention to the disafortunate experience during my time at the Hilton Hotel located in Vancouver Downtown.
Firstly
, I would like to provide some details about the unpleasant days that my family and I lived during our short visit. Beginning, the room service was terrible, the food arrived uncooked and cold.
Then
, during our
last
 night, we went to the Moon Restaurant, the personnel were rude when we complained about the overcooked steak that my husband received.
Moreover
, there weren't clean towels available in the pool area for my kids: in fact, the towels in the room weren't replaced by the cleaning staff. Bearing in mind, the description mentioned above I would like to request compensation as we felt disappointed. We would like to ask for a refund, at least 50% of the total paid since we invested an important amount of our budget trip in
this
 accommodation.
Finally
, as a recommendation, you should provide new customer service training for the employees.
Also
, new cooking procedures could be helpful in order to improve the service provided. I sincerely expect that my request will be given the utmost consideration. Faithfully, Mary Liu
Submitted by mariajoser3 on

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Task Achievement
Ensure to use spell check tools to avoid spelling errors such as 'disafortunate' instead of 'unfortunate.'.
Coherence and Cohesion
Better linkage between paragraphs would improve the flow of the email.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific suggestions for improvement, such as 'implement a checklist to ensure rooms are fully stocked' rather than general statements.
Task Achievement
You have appropriately described specific issues: uncooked food, rude personnel, and lack of towels.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your email includes a clear introduction, body, and conclusion, making it easy to understand your main points.
Task Achievement
Your request for compensation is straightforward and justified, demonstrating a clear response to the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • check-in process
  • room condition
  • cleanliness
  • broken amenities
  • noise levels
  • inconveniences
  • compensation
  • refund
  • complimentary stay
  • constructive feedback
  • housekeeping
  • staff training
  • maintenance
  • hospitality
  • customer satisfaction
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