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Band 6.5

Your office manager is considering a new work schedule. She is thinking about closing the office at 12:00 p.m. on Fridays. In order to replace lost work hours, however, all employees would have to start work at 8:00 a.m. instead of 9:00 a.m., Monday to Friday. Your manager is surveying all employees to see if they prefer the new work schedule or the old one.

#office #manager #work #schedule #p #m #fridays #hours #employees #monday #friday
Personally, I consider that the most beneficial option to employees is adopting the new schedule from 8:00 to 5:00 since it will provide a shorter job routine on Friday.
Whereas
, some may argue that the current schedule is good, definitely the new one brings some huge advantages.
Firstly
, finishing early on Friday could provide a better work-life balance. Since the office will close at noon, all employees would have time to do those duties or errands that they cannot do during the week
such
 as going to the bank, attending school meetings, or buying groceries.
As a result
, weekends will be exclusively dedicated to their family and leisure activities.
Secondly
, commuting time will be positively impacted by the change. If the office hours start one hour earlier, personnel would avoid the morning rush hour.
Thus
, the stress of getting to the job on time will be reduced.
Finally
, some studies have shown that morning routines are more effective.
As a result
, productivity and the work environment could be fostered exponentially.
According to
 what was aforementioned,
this
 is my opinion, but I will support whichever decision the company would make. Thanks for giving me the opportunity to express my views.
Submitted by mariajoser3 on

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structure
Consider adding a brief introduction to clearly state your overall viewpoint before diving into the reasons for your preference.
evidence
Supporting your points with relevant data or specific studies can make your argument more compelling and authoritative.
balance
Make sure to clearly outline any potential disadvantages of the new schedule as well, to show a balanced perspective.
content
You effectively argued how the new schedule could improve work-life balance and reduce commuting stress.
structure
Your essay is well-organized, with each paragraph discussing a separate point in a logical manner.
language
The language used is clear and appropriate, making your points easy to understand.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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