An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poor countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?

The
trend
of moving to other
countries
is increasing day by day. The majority of experienced skilled trade workers are moving to
welldeveloped
Correct your spelling
well-developed
well developed
countries
for their future and a better lifestyle.
This
trend
should be
stoped
Correct your spelling
stopped
show examples
immediately.
This
essay will outline
causes
Correct article usage
the causes
show examples
and solutions of
this
trend
before reaching the final conclusion. There are myriads of reasons which pinpoint the problem of
this
phenomenon. The
topnotch
Correct your spelling
top-notch
show examples
concrete reason is
lack
Correct article usage
the lack
show examples
of
employee
Fix the agreement mistake
employees
show examples
. After getting their experience if they
leaving
Wrong verb form
leave
show examples
continues, definitely shortage of
skill
Replace the word
skilled
show examples
workers will
be increased
Wrong verb form
increase
show examples
.
As a result
, Poor
countries
become more poor. Another pivotal aspect is the Economy. If
this
trend
does not change it will have a huge impact on the economy of the nation.
Furthermore
, They have to hire from other
countries
to run their services which will lead to drawbacks for the country and
also
affect their general individuals. There are colossal ways and means that can be taken to combat the problem. But
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
effective is
appereciate
Correct your spelling
appreciated
appreciate
.The Government should reward them with a bonus and other facilities and especially with pay rates and encourage them to stay in their home
countries
.
In addition
, By providing special treatment and
further
facilities.
As well as
giving a rebate on taxes and climate bonus and most especially with subsidy on their study fees. If given ways can be taken seriously
this
mess can be solved.
To conclude
, If the Government bodies and general people join their hands together
this
problem can be uprooted and solved. The Government should pay attention to
this
phenomenon.
Submitted by jagdeeptoor751 on

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coherence cohesion
Try to use a more varied range of sentence structures to improve readability and overall interest.
coherence cohesion
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and stays focused on that idea throughout.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your points. This will make your ideas more convincing.
structure
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, with a decent attempt to outline causes and solutions.
task achievement
The essay addresses both parts of the prompt: the problems and solutions to the trend of professionals leaving poorer countries.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Brain drain
  • Skilled professionals
  • Healthcare systems
  • Education systems
  • Economic growth
  • Dependency on foreign aid
  • Social inequality
  • Quality healthcare
  • Quality education
  • Retain talent
  • International cooperation
  • Sustainable growth
  • Scholarships
  • Professional development
  • Remote work capabilities
  • Local research funding
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