Ordinary people try to copy famous personalities by seeing them on TV or reading about them in the newspapers. What is the reason for this? Is it a good idea to copy famous personalities?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
modern era,
while
social media is taking over
all
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
the world, influencers and
idols
have more impact on viewers' personalities. Some individuals tend to intimate famous
lifestyle
Fix the agreement mistake
lifestyles
show examples
by following them on broadcast or newspaper.
This
essay will discuss the causes and the disadvantages and advantages of
this
situations
Fix the agreement mistake
situation
show examples
.
Firstly
, there is no doubt that most if not all of the famous influencers and
idols
on social media are
successul
Correct your spelling
successful
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their specific field.
Therefore
, the viewers who
also
want to have an achievement
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
their life will follow the famous people that they know.
For example
,
according to
New
Correct article usage
the New
show examples
York Times, autobiography is the best seller type of
books
Fix the agreement mistake
book
show examples
from 2020 to 2024. It is
a prove
Verb problem
proof
show examples
that readers would like to follow celebrities and copy their characteristics so that they can be as
succeed
Replace the word
successful
show examples
as their
idols
. From my point of view, following
characteristics
Correct article usage
the characteristics
show examples
of celebrities is a good way to
widespead
Correct your spelling
widespread
well-behavior
Change the spelling
well-behaviour
show examples
to ordinary people.
Combining
Wrong verb form
Combined
show examples
with the ability of propaganda, well-behaved
characteristic
Fix the agreement mistake
characteristics
show examples
would be intimated by ordinary people, and
then
the society would become better.
However
, it is clear to see that not all of the
idols
are well-behaved. Regarding the youth who have not had ethical
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards
show examples
yet, they could be impacted
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
the infamous influencers.
For instance
, after Diddy, who is
well-knowned
Correct your spelling
well-known
as a rapper and a producer, was arrested in May 2024
due to
being a drug dealer and a raper, some fans still try to protect him by providing fake information.
To conclude
, certain individuals copy their
idols
seen on different social networks as a way of making funds for a living since most of them are not working.
This
is not a bad move because they make clean cash. These and other issues are discussed above at length.
Submitted by buihuuminh99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The essay does address the question and provides relevant points, but it could be more fully developed. Consider expanding on the reasons why people imitate famous personalities and discuss both the positive and negative aspects in greater detail to enhance your task achievement score.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. However, the logical flow can be improved with smoother transitions between ideas. For example, instead of jumping from one idea to another, use appropriate linking phrases to connect sentences and paragraphs more cohesively.
organization
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps provide a structured response.
relevant examples
You've included relevant examples, such as the New York Times and Diddy's case, which help to support your arguments.
balanced perspective
Your attempt to address both sides of the argument (the advantages and disadvantages of copying famous personalities) is commendable and fits well within the scope of the essay prompt.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • emulate
  • epitomes
  • self-esteem
  • void
  • lifestyles
  • role models
  • inspiration
  • unrealistic expectations
  • disappointment
  • unique talents
  • superficial
  • material wealth
  • public image
  • personal fulfillment
  • ethical values
  • constructive
  • personal growth
  • values
  • philanthropy
  • resilience
What to do next:
Look at other essays: