IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

The charts below show the number of Japanese tourists travelling abroad between 1985 and 1995 and Australia's share of the Japanese tourist market. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
#show #japanese #tourists #australia #tourist #market #report #university #lecturer #information
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar chart illustrates the number of
Japanese
Use synonyms
 travellers in other countries over 11 years from 1985 to 1995, the units of data show millions of
people
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, the below chart provides information on
Japanese
Use synonyms
 tourists who chose to come to
Australia
Use synonyms
 over a decade from 1985 to 1994, the units indicated in percentages.
Overall
Linking Words
, the travelling trend of
Japanese
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 increased continuously
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and
also
Linking Words
 affected the significant uptrend of visiting
Australia
Use synonyms
. First and foremost, the rising number of
Japanese
Use synonyms
 tourists numbers in 1985 was only 5 million
people
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, in 1995, the
Japanese
Use synonyms
 travelled more than 15 million
people
Use synonyms
. Even though the trend dropped a bit in 1991, the main reason can be summarized as that not come from
Australia
Use synonyms
's travelling. The trend in
Australia
Use synonyms
 in 1991 remained upward.
While
Linking Words
 in 1989 and 1994,
Japanese
Use synonyms
 individuals decreased travelling in
Australia
Use synonyms
,
this
Linking Words
 issue did not affect to total number of abroad tours of
Japanese
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by juneyjelly58 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words japanese, people, australia with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: