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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The table below presents the number of children ever born to women aged 40-44 years ni Australia for each year the information was colected since 1981. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The table below presents the number of children ever born to women aged 40-44 years ni Australia for each year the information was colected since 1981. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The table shows the data collected for Australian
women
Use synonyms
 between the ages of 40 to 44, categorized with respect to the number of
children
Use synonyms
 they gave birth to, starting from none to 4 or more across four different years since 1981.
Overall
Linking Words
, most
women
Use synonyms
 gave birth to two
children
Use synonyms
 and
this
Linking Words
 increased consistently each year. The share decreased significantly for the ones having 3 or more
children
Use synonyms
whereas
Linking Words
 it increased for the ones staying single or having a single child between 1981 and 2006. In 1981, 29% of the
women
Use synonyms
 gave birth to two infants making
this
Linking Words
 the dominant choice which continued to be the case till 2006 (38.2%) increasing throughout the period.
This
Linking Words
 upward trend was followed by those bearing one or zero
children
Use synonyms
, each with a share of 7.6 and 8.5 in 1981 respectively, to 13.2 and 15.9 in 2006, respectively. Contrarily, despite starting out with the second highest percentage of 27.6 in 1981,
women
Use synonyms
 with 4 or more
children
Use synonyms
 dropped in numbers (18.9%) and were overtaken by those having 3 in 1986 (27%).
While
Linking Words
 the downward trend continued for both the categories,
women
Use synonyms
 with 3
children
Use synonyms
 stayed ahead in numbers in 1996 and 2001 as well,
whereas
Linking Words
 4 or more
children
Use synonyms
 now became the rarity with only 11% of the
women
Use synonyms
 going for it in 2001 accounting for the least share among all.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words women, children with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "gave" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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