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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows what Anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduates degree course. The table shows the salaries of the anthropologists in work after five years.

The chart below shows what Anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduates degree course. The table shows the salaries of the anthropologists in work after five years.
#anthropology #graduates #university #undergraduates #course #salaries #anthropologists #work #five #years
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The following pie chart
illustrate
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illustrates
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 the percentage of Anthropologists who
persuited
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pursued
persuaded
 different paths after graduating from one university. The table displays the salaries of the anthropologists in
work
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 after five years. At first
glance
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glance,
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 it is evident that most anthropology
graduates
Use synonyms
 followed a full-time career path. From the
table
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table,
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 it can be seen that most Freelance consultants and Government sectors earned the largest amount of money. Looking at the details of the chart,the largest portion of
graduates
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 chased
a
Correct article usage
apply
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full-time
work
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, with 52%. 15% of Anthropology
graduates
Use synonyms
 did
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Part-time
work
Use synonyms
 after graduating,
while
Linking Words
 12% of them stayed unemployed. Interestingly, 8% of students continued their higher education, doing a
full time
Add a hyphen
full-time
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 postgard study.
Lastly
Linking Words
, only 5% of
graduates
Use synonyms
 did
the
Remove the article
apply
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both studying and
work
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. In terms of the table,
while
Linking Words
 40% of the Freelance consultants and half of
tbe
Correct your spelling
the
 Government sectors made up to 100,000 dollars, which is the largest salary for
this
Linking Words
 position, a large number of private companies,
that is
Linking Words
 30%, made 50,000 to 74,999 dollars. The percentage of Freelance consultants and
Fovernment
Correct your spelling
government
 sectors who
earned
Wrong verb form
earn
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 a
little
Correct word choice
small
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 amount of money is only 5% per cent, compared with the percentage of private companies which is 10%.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words work, graduates with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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