IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the consumption of fish and some different kinds of meat in a European country between 1979 and 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#consumption #fish #kinds #meat #european #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph illustrates
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information about the
Europen
Correct your spelling
European
show examples
 country and the use of
meat
Use synonyms
 between the
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
 1979 and 2004 in it. It
also
Linking Words
 shows various forms of
meat
Use synonyms
 like fish, lamb, beef and chicken,
along with
Linking Words
 their consumption in grams per person in a week. As far as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fish and lamb
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 concerned, it has been noticed that in 1979 more
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 50 grams of
fishes
Fix the agreement mistake
fish
show examples
 were eaten by individuals in a week. Later from 1984 to 2004 a slow decline was noticed which reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
50 grams.
However
Linking Words
,
consuming
Replace the word
the consumption
show examples
 of
lamb's
Change noun form
lamb
show examples
meat
Use synonyms
 was
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
 in 1979, which was around 150
g
Use synonyms
 per person but soon there was a drop in its consumption which reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
less
Linking Words
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
 100g.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, interest in beef was
also
Linking Words
 at its peak, which was more than 200g in 1997. But because of its fall off below 150
g
Use synonyms
,
made
Verb problem
apply
show examples
it less popular between 1984 to 2004.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
chicken consumption was low in 1979 but more and more interest towards
chicken's
Change noun form
chicken
show examples
meat
Use synonyms
 was found in the
Europen
Correct your spelling
European
show examples
 country in the later years, in which it climbed up to 250g in a week in 2004.
Submitted by hadiyanasir73 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words meat, g with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
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