The charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attending. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The pie chart and table present information based
o
the location and types of dance classes in which young people from Australia are participatingChange preposition
on
in
. Change preposition
apply
Overall
, the biggest proportion of indiuviduals
prefer private studios, Correct your spelling
individuals
while
the least part of participants choose college-based studios.
Firstly
, almost a
half of all dancers prefer to have Correct article usage
apply
a ldanse lessons
in a private studio, Correct the article-noun agreement
ldanse lessons
a ldanse lesson
while
at least a quater
choose Correct your spelling
quarter
scholl
halls and study where after Correct your spelling
school
Scholl
school
day. Add an article
the school
Besides
, 10% and 18% were allocated to college-based stidios
and community halls respectively.
Correct your spelling
studios
studies
Secondly
, accordind
to the data presented in the table 600 Correct your spelling
according
student
under 11 prefer to visit ballet classes, around 450 choose Fix the agreement mistake
students
tap
and only 300 Add the particle
to tap
parcipate
in Correct your spelling
participate
participated
moder
dance courses. Another age group has the same preferences. Over 500 Correct your spelling
modern
students
are the
fans of modern dancing, Correct article usage
apply
moreover
tap Add a comma
moreover,
clases
were chosen by Correct your spelling
classes
class
aproximately
400 Correct your spelling
approximately
students
, while
only 300 pupils are participating in ballet.
In conclusion, it is obvious that as you get older, your preferences change. This
process is also
demonstrated in the presented charts. For example
, students
under 11 choose ballet, while
pupils from 11 to 16 prefer more modern dance, these preferences are reflected in the places where they practice, that
is why older Correct pronoun usage
which
students
prefer more some
advanced Correct quantifier usage
apply
cources
in private studios and Correct your spelling
courses
thiss
Correct your spelling
this
choose
Replace the word
choices
are
Change the verb form
is
influence
Correct article usage
an influence
on
the first pie chart.Change preposition
by
Submitted by viktoria.popova92 on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words students with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "present" was used 3 times.
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