Some people believe that residents are responsible for keeping the roads clean and others say that it is the responsibility of the government. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Roads
are important in our lives when we go
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
different places without hassles. It is important to make it clean and safe to use all the time. Whilst some would say that
roads
should be
clean
Replace the word
cleaned
show examples
by the people around that area, some would
tell
Verb problem
say
show examples
that it is
also
the responsibility of the government to maintain the cleanliness of the road. I believe that the two sectors are responsible
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
maintaining the safety and cleanliness of the road.
Firstly
, the people are the first to benefit if our
roads
are clean as we are using
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
every now and
then
. It
also
gives us the accessibility of going to places without any restrictions,
therefore
, we should
also
give our time to spend community service in cleaning our
roads
to avoid accidents it may occur.
Secondly
, the government must be the first agency that imposes the cleanliness of the
roads
at all times.
However
, it should
also
shoulders
Change the verb form
shoulder
show examples
the expenses related to it as taxes should be put on the projects that people will benefit from it.
In addition
to that, they should do monitoring to the
roads
we are using so
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
will not cause harm to any person. In conclusion,
roads
are very essential in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
as
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
gives
Correct subject-verb agreement
give
show examples
us the opportunity to easily access the places we want to go,
however
, we should
also
help our government to make
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
more reliable by cleaning and maintaining
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
all the time.
Submitted by rodadoctor2 on

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task response
You've made a good start with the introduction and conclusion, providing clear statements and summarizing your viewpoint. However, to improve coherence and cohesion, try to make your examples and points more concrete and detailed. This will help in better supporting your arguments.
task response
Your discussion of both views is clear but can be more thorough. Providing specific examples or scenarios can strengthen your arguments. For instance, mentioning community initiatives or government programs can add depth.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Adding connecting phrases or sentences can help your essay flow better.
coherence cohesion
There are some minor grammatical issues and awkward phrasings that, if corrected, would make your writing more polished. Consider revising sentences for clarity. For example, "shoulders the expenses" can be rephrased for better clarity.
task response
Your essay clearly states both sides of the argument regarding road cleanliness, which is a strong point in task response.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are well-defined, summarizing your opinion effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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