Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and inciude any relevant examples from your own.

Nowadays world
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
facing several environmental issues that have a significant impact on
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives. Some people believe that the main reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
environmental problems is the loss
some
Change preposition
of some
show examples
specific
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
plants
and
animals
.
Whereas
others believe that there are several factors
contribute
Correct pronoun usage
that contribute
show examples
to environmental changes. In my opinion, I agree that both aspect plays a significant role
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
.
To begin
with, the
animals
and
plants
showing
Wrong verb form
show
show examples
a
fundemental
Correct your spelling
fundamental
effect in our life sequences.
Moreover
, the deficiency of some
animals
Fix the agreement mistake
animal
show examples
or
plants
Change the noun form
plant
show examples
species might have an
advers
Correct your spelling
adverse
affect
Correct your spelling
effect
show examples
on
envirmonal
Correct your spelling
environ
balance.
In addition
, some
plants
are essential in
humudity
Correct your spelling
humidity
balance and
wathear
Correct your spelling
water
weather
enhacement
Correct your spelling
enhancement
.
Furthermore
,
plants
have crucial roles
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
Carbion
Correct your spelling
carbon
dioxide absorption and oxygen release.
However
, some
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
animals
have
play
Change the verb form
played
show examples
an essential roles
Correct the article-noun agreement
an essential role
essential roles
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Earth
Change noun form
Earth's
show examples
balance. As
en
Correct your spelling
an
show examples
example,
occesion
Correct your spelling
occasion
animals
such
as some
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
of
fishs
Correct your spelling
fishes
fish
,
dolphen
Correct your spelling
dolphin
dolphins
an
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
whales are promoting
occesion
Correct your spelling
occasion
protection and
reduce
Wrong verb form
reducing
show examples
the number of people waste.
On the other hand
, global warming and air pollution have a
dertimental
Correct your spelling
detrimental
effect on
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
.
Furthermore
, many of
humans
Change noun form
humans'
human's
show examples
bad habits are
axeclerating
Correct your spelling
accelerating
the percentage of
gobal
Correct your spelling
global
warming.
In addition
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fossel
Correct your spelling
fossil
vessel
fuels from conventional cars have an adverse effect on the quality of air.
However
, some industry factors are using banded material that can highly affect the number of pollution
result
Wrong verb form
resulting
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the number of medical illnesses
with increases
Replace the word
increasing
show examples
over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time.A recent study in the UK proves that the
mair
Correct your spelling
main
show examples
reason
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
environment
Replace the word
environmental
show examples
unbalance
Change the verb form
unbalances
show examples
is the
overuseage
Correct your spelling
over usage
of traditional
trasportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
such
as cars,
buss
Correct your spelling
buses
show examples
and trains.
To conclude
, there are many factors
should
Correct pronoun usage
that should
show examples
take into
consedration
Correct your spelling
consideration
to reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
environmental issues.
In addition
,
loss
Correct article usage
the loss
show examples
of particular
animals
or
plants
Change the noun form
plant
show examples
species
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a significant place on environmental problems.
However
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
air pollution and global warming can highly affect
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human safety.
Submitted by rahafalkhashti7 on

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Grammar
There are some grammatical errors and typos (e.g., 'advers' instead of 'adverse,' 'envirmonal' instead of 'environmental,' 'occestion' instead of 'ocean,' etc.). Proofreading and correcting these mistakes will enhance the readability of your essay.
Cohesion
While you have presented a coherent structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, the logical flow between the sentences and paragraphs can be improved. Using more cohesive devices (e.g., 'In addition to this,' 'Therefore,' 'On the contrary') will strengthen the connections between your points.
Examples
Your examples are somewhat relevant but could be more specific and detailed. Adding more concrete examples and statistics will make your arguments more compelling and demonstrate a stronger task achievement.
Clarity
Some sentences can be rephrased for better clarity. For example, 'the mair reason of environment unbalance' can be rephrased to 'the main cause of environmental imbalance.' Refining sentence structures will help you convey your ideas more clearly.
Task Response
You have addressed both views presented in the prompt, and you have provided a clear opinion on the topic. This shows a solid understanding of the task requirements.
Structure
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is crucial for a coherent and cohesive structure.
Understanding
You have demonstrated awareness of various environmental issues, including the loss of species, global warming, and air pollution. This shows a broad understanding of the topic.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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