The working week should be shorter and workers should have a longer weekend.
In recent years, people often argued that reducing the working week and increasing the weekends would be better, and employees will improve their productivity and well-being. I tend to agree with that statement because of the benefits of
this
development.
One of the compelling reasons for this
is that the workers can focus on their jobs due to
long weekends and they will be more productive during the work. Since, individuals feel more confident and enhance their efficiency when they spend more time with their family, friends, and loved ones. For instance
, in Italy, residents have significantly more time for a break than in other countries. Nevertheless
, their performance is still one of the best in the whole world. Therefore
, people need longer rest days to concentrate on work fully. As a result
, they will avoid burnout and will have considerable physical changes.
Moreover
, additional weekends can be vital in improving mental health and reducing workers' stress. When employees have some issues with mental health, the company’s profit and employee satisfaction will decline. I can be a good example of this
situation because I have worked as a waiter in a restaurant business without any rest for 2 months, and as a result
, I was too nervous, and it was easy to piss me off. Hence
, all companies should add more rest days to develop their profit.
In conclusion, the advantages of a healthier work-life balance, such
as reduced stress level
, improved physical and mental health, and productivity development are the main reasons for shorter working days. Fix the agreement mistake
levels
This
could lead to a more balanced work-life for employees.Submitted by a.seytzhanova on
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task achievement
Your essay provides a clear response to the task and covers most aspects of the prompt well. However, try to incorporate more specific examples and statistical data to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
While your ideas are generally clear, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and transitions smoothly to the next. This will increase the overall coherence and cohesion of your essay.
general
Work on diversifying your sentence structures and vocabulary to make your writing more engaging.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-structured and clearly present the main idea of the essay.
task achievement
The essay reflects a good understanding of the task and covers relevant points regarding productivity and mental health.
task achievement
The personal example you provided adds a touch of authenticity and relevance to your argument.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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