Task 2. Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects equally. Others believe that teenagers should focus on the subjects that they are best at or that they find the most interesting.

#people #teenagers #school #subjects #focus

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Adults are often encouraged to focus on all academic material. Some argue that students should concentrate

the

Change preposition

on the

show examples

subject that they looking for

there

Correct your spelling

their

show examples

passion rather

then

Replace the word

than

show examples

focusing on

what

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

others

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

subjects

. In my opinion, both categories of

subjects

are equally important for

teenagers

Change noun form

teenagers'

teenager's

show examples

development. It is

importance

Replace the word

important

show examples

to study and learn all

subjects

Education

is not just a piece of paper _ the piece of paper is the representation of

skills

Correct article usage

the skills

show examples

and quality of a person.

Education

improves quality of life people who are better educated have a better life.

This

is not because they tend to have more material things , but because they have a greater level of understanding and

therefore

they have a broader vision and a better ability to

Wrong verb form

relate

show examples

to achievement, which is closely related to

education

, not material possessions. Despite learning

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

important I think

Wrong verb form

following

show examples

your passion and ambition is most significant. Many of the world's greatest thinkers and leaders did not have very good educational backgrounds, but all are highly educated because they learned in other ways .

On the other hand

, students often think that getting

education

Add an article

an education

show examples

is the process of

going

Verb problem

gaining

show examples

knowledge

Knowledge

is the lowest form of learning and is not

focus

Add an article

the focus

show examples

western

Capitalize word

Western

show examples

education

Education

is the process of learning to solve problems. Many educated people work in fields they know how to solve problems, including the problem of lack of

knowledge

. In conclusion, despite all

subjects

are

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

essential to

learn

Change the verb form

learning

show examples

also

teenagers should follow their passions.

This

is not because prefer to have more material things but they tend to have more understanding and

knowledge

Submitted by a.almakmari93 on Tue Oct 01 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Your essay would benefit from clearer and more structured paragraphs. Ensure each paragraph conveys a single main idea and is logically connected to the next.

Coherence and Cohesion

Make sure your introduction starts broad and narrows down to your specific viewpoint. Similarly, your conclusion should recap the main points succinctly.

Task Achievement

Support your points with specific and relevant examples. This will strengthen your arguments and make your essay more compelling.

Task Achievement

Strive to clarify your main ideas effectively. Sometimes, the main points were a bit unclear or not fully developed.

Coherence and Cohesion

You have provided a clear stance in your introduction and elaborated on it in the following paragraphs.

Task Achievement

The essay engages with both sides of the argument, which shows a balanced discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Task 2. Some people believe that teenagers should concentrate on all school subjects equally. Others believe that teenagers should focus on the subjects that they are best at or that they find the most interesting.

Fully explain your ideas

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Some people think that new houses should be built in the same style as older houses in the local area. Others disagree and say that local authorities should allow people to build houses in the styles of their own choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The use of social media such as Facebook or Twitter is replacing face-to-face contact this century. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Are classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child's development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?