These days, fooddays, food travels long distances before reaching consumers, and it is therefore believed that consuming locally grown food would bring about a number of economic and environmental benefits. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages ?

It has become a recent trend that
food
is transported long distances to consumers, which makes some
people
recognize the
benefits
of local products from both environmental and economic perspectives. The advantage of long transportation is to increase financial
benefits
for companies
while
there are some disadvantages as tracks and planes pollute the environment severely. The primary benefit of the distant delivery of
food
is to boost
economical
Replace the word
economic
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benefits
as
company
Correct article usage
the company
show examples
transports products to a place where they are
demanded
Change preposition
in demand
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.
In other words
, it will be more lucrative for businesses when their orders increase from distant regions, making it a valuable opportunity for them to spread their
food
.
For instance
,
earnings
Correct article usage
the earnings
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of a fish company called Sash in Mie rose by nearly 30% since it started to deliver its unique
food
to the inland where the supply of marine products is extremely
lower
Replace the word
low
show examples
.
Thus
, the business turns out
succeessful
Correct your spelling
successful
, meeting the various needs of
people
in different areas. The disadvantage of
this
phenomenon is the increasing damage to the environment as more transportations are used. Indeed, the contamination of air has become an emergent issue since it leads to an accelerating rise in global temperatures. To illustrate
this
,
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
temperature
rises
Wrong verb form
has risen
show examples
by about 1.5 degrees Celsius since the number of tracks delivering
food
to distant places increased dramatically in 2018.
Therefore
, the continuous reliance on long transportation will make the Earth a more hostile place to live for both animals and humans, which requires long periods of time for recovery. In conclusion, the
benefits
of long transportation
encourages
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encourage
show examples
business
Fix the agreement mistake
businesses
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to expand as it successfully meets the
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
of
people
in various places.
However
,
people
should be aware of
a
Correct article usage
apply
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serious side
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
as vehicles pollute nature beyond the control of humans.
Submitted by mizuho on

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task achievement
Ensure all main points are well-supported with evidence or examples to strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on using more varied linking words and phrases to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
The essay clearly states the trend and gives a balanced view of both advantages and disadvantages, which is good for Task Response.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the essay with a clear introduction and conclusion enhances readability.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon footprint
  • Greenhouse gas emissions
  • Fuel consumption
  • Local economy
  • Local farmers
  • Boosts
  • Fresher produce
  • Nutritious
  • Transit
  • Seasonal eating
  • Varied diet
  • Balanced diet
  • Preserve
  • Farmland
  • Green spaces
  • Limited variety
  • Monotonous diet
  • Higher costs
  • Imported food
  • Smaller-scale production
  • Reduced economies of scale
  • Climate constraints
  • Year-round
  • Shortages
  • Natural disasters
  • Weather conditions
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