IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

By punishing murderers with the death penalty, society is also guilt of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? (AGREE)

#murderers #death #penalty #society #guilt #murder #life #prison #punishment
The argument that the
death
penalty
 constitutes a form of murder perpetrated by the state is compelling and merits serious consideration. I agree that
life
imprisonment
 is a more ethical and effective punishment for murderers.
Firstly
, the
death
penalty
 raises profound moral questions. When the state executes an individual, it replicates the act of murder, albeit in a legally sanctioned manner.
This
 paradox not only challenges our ethical standards but
also
 sets a dangerous precedent. By endorsing capital punishment, society implies that taking a
life
 can be justified under certain circumstances, which contradicts the fundamental principle that murder is inherently wrong.
Moreover
,
life
imprisonment
 allows for the possibility of rehabilitation and redemption. Human beings are capable of change, and
while
 some may argue that murderers are beyond redemption, many individuals have transformed their lives
while
 serving long sentences. By providing inmates with opportunities for rehabilitation, society can promote a more humane approach to justice.
Additionally
, the
death
penalty
 is irreversible. There have been numerous cases of wrongful convictions, where innocent people were sentenced to
death
 and later exonerated. The risk of executing an innocent person is a grave injustice that
life
imprisonment
 avoids, as it allows for the correction of judicial errors. In conclusion, the moral implications of the
death
penalty
, combined with the potential for rehabilitation and the risk of irreversible mistakes, strongly support the argument for
life
imprisonment
 as a preferable punishment for murderers.
This
 approach not only aligns with ethical standards but
also
 fosters a more compassionate society.
Submitted by onlineconsumer on

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task achievement
To enhance task response, include more specific examples or case studies to substantiate your points, which will provide a stronger basis for your argument.
coherence cohesion
Consider using more transitional phrases to ensure seamless flow between your ideas, enhancing the overall coherence and cohesion.
task achievement
The essay presents a clear and well-structured argument, effectively addressing the prompt by agreeing with the statement and providing reasons for the preference for life imprisonment over the death penalty.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure and clarity are maintained throughout the essay, with a solid introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion well.
coherence cohesion
The essay successfully presents main points with adequate support, highlighting ethical, rehabilitative, and judicial considerations.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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