Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us t buy things. othere people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It goes without saying that
people
are using mobiles
phones to pay the Change the noun form
mobile
bill
. An argument has bees
put forward that different countries paying Correct your spelling
been
bill
Fix the agreement mistake
bills
increasing
using Change the word
increasingly
there
own mobile Correct your spelling
their
app
to pay Fix the agreement mistake
apps
amount
. In my opinion, Add an article
the amount
this
statement hold
a valid ground.
There are many reasons Change the verb form
holds
the
advantages in Change preposition
for the
given
statement. Add an article
the given
a given
To begin
with
they are now safe to Add a comma
with,
cary
Correct your spelling
carry
money
before that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
caring
Verb problem
carrying
a
Remove the article
apply
money
is
Wrong verb form
was
to
Replace the word
too
much
Correct quantifier usage
apply
defficult
because Correct your spelling
difficult
difficulty
thief
Fix the agreement mistake
thieves
come
and robe them. Wrong verb form
came
Furthermore
, It's now easy to transfer money
to shopkeeper
and they check easily by using Fix the agreement mistake
shopkeepers
cell
phone
. What is more, Fix the agreement mistake
phones
that
using Correct word choice
apply
cell
Correct article usage
a cell
phone
app
is much better that
caring Correct word choice
than
money
because no one Change preposition
for money
see
how much Change the verb form
sees
money
you have.
Moreover
Add a comma
Moreover,
people
think that paying bill
are much easier Fix the agreement mistake
bills
whith
Correct your spelling
with
cell
phone
because we easily pay Fix the agreement mistake
phones
bill
from home using Fix the agreement mistake
bills
phone
. Add an article
the phone
a phone
Therefore
, using cell
Add an article
a cell
the cell
phone
to pay tuition fees is Fix the agreement mistake
phones
easire
Correct your spelling
easier
then
Correct your spelling
than
givening
Correct your spelling
giving
given
money
by hand to institoute
. Correct your spelling
institute
Lastly
, people
feel comfortable and relaxe
to using Correct your spelling
relaxed
relax
there
Replace the word
their
phone
and Fix the agreement mistake
phones
pay
Wrong verb form
paying
mediciane
Correct your spelling
medical
money
with Add an article
the app
app
.
Fix the agreement mistake
apps
However
, some people
might argue that disadvantages also
also
become they believe that the Remove the redundancy
apply
money
value are
not as that as they have and Change the verb form
is
people
will not collect paper
note
as it's important. Fix the agreement mistake
notes
According to
them
our Add a comma
them,
yound
generation will not see the Correct your spelling
young
paper
note and they will never know about paper
note importance.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that although
paying money
using cell
Add an article
a cell
the cell
phone
with app
is much easier Add an article
the app
an app
Change preposition
than then
then
traditional way, Correct your spelling
the
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
people
think that paper
not
Rephrase
apply
are
Change the verb form
is
also
good. Therefore
, We must use cell
phone
app
to pay for things Fix the agreement mistake
apps
becasue
it's easy, easy to carry, etc.Correct your spelling
because
Submitted by saifkhandik1 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
Try to develop your arguments with more depth and provide specific examples to illustrate your points. This will help in making your essay more compelling and comprehensive.
task achievement
Pay attention to grammatical errors and typographical mistakes. These minor inaccuracies can distract the reader and affect the clarity of your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Focus on organizing your essay clearly. Begin each paragraph with a topic sentence and ensure your ideas flow logically and cohesively.
coherence cohesion
You've included an introduction and conclusion, helping to frame your argument within a structured format.
task achievement
You attempted to discuss both views as required by the task, which is a positive indicator of addressing the task requirements.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.