IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people believe that a gap year between school and university is a good idea, while others disagree strongly. Consider both sides of this debate and present your own opinion. You should give reasons for your answer, and include ideas and examples from your own knowledge and experience. Write at least 250 word

#people #gap #year #school #university #idea #debate #word
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Nowadays, It seems that a
gap
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year
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 has become a trend. Many graduated students chose to have a
gap
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year
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 rather than
found
Wrong verb form
find
show examples
 a job immediately. Some would say it is a good
clear
Add a hyphen
clear-mind
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mind
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experience
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 after graduation, but some would say it
just
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is just
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 a
waste
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 of
time
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. From my point of view, if there are chance
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
Use synonyms
gap
Correct article usage
a gap
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, it is
defintely
Correct your spelling
definitely
 a precious
experience
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 that might not
meet
Wrong verb form
be met
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 for the rest of
the
Change the word
your
show examples
life
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. Because productive use of
gap
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time
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 can clear your
mind
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,
also
Linking Words
 can have a change in your outlook on
life
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experience
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. It is not a
waste
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 of
time
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 if you do not
waste
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 it. If there is a chance for
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gap
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a gap
the gap
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year
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, it would be a rare
experience
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 for you. But remember the prerequisite is 'chance'. It means you do not have too
much
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many
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 financial concerns,
time
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 concerns, etc.
For example
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, my friend Zhu had a very special tour in
Xinjiang
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 after graduation. She
was
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apply
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applied to be a volunteer in
Xinjiang
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, she was
like
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apply
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working for
Xinjiang
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construction
Capitalize word
Construction
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 without
salary
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a salary
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. She said though she had no 'return', she did not regret
of
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apply
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it, because she has learnt a lot from
this
Linking Words
experience
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 and has cleared her
mind
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. It really made her feel alive. She met good people, and she learnt to love everything
ih
Correct your spelling
in
 her
life
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. Every
secne
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second
 in
Xinjiang
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 made her grateful and devout. So it would be a good
experience
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 if have you a
gap
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.
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Gap
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The gap
A gap
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 could be an opportunity to change your outlook on
life
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. A writer shared her
experience
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to
Change preposition
with
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 us. She went abroad for
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gap
Correct article usage
a gap
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 after she quit her job. In France, she learnt that you do not have to worry about work every day, she knew there was more to
life
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 than fighting for day and night. Integrating into French
life
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 makes her feel alive for herself for the first
time
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, enjoying
life
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 for the first
time
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, and working hard to feel the beauty of
life
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 is true. Through her writing, I can feel the freedom and vitality. So I think
gap
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time
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 can make you change your view of
life
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.
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Gap
Correct article usage
A gap
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year
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wold
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would
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 not be
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waste
Correct article usage
a waste
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 of
time
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 if you have an action. It would
creat
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create
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avluable
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valuable
life
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 experiences and have another view of
life
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, which can clear your
mind
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,
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apply
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 so that you can live more
great- hearted
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great-hearted
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. If there is
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 opportunity for
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gap
Add an article
a gap
the gap
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year
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, maybe you can stop being busy for a
while
Linking Words
, and do
such
Linking Words
pure
Correct article usage
a pure
show examples
 thing for a
year
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.
Time
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wold
Correct your spelling
would
show examples
 tell the truth.
Submitted by asllchkied on

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coherence and cohesion
Try to better organize your main points in the paragraphs. Each paragraph should clearly focus on one main idea, supported by examples or evidence.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph logically leads to the next and don't forget to clearly signal changes in topic between them.
task response
Make sure to fully address all aspects of the prompt, such as mentioning opposing views more thoroughly.
task response
Use a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to express ideas more clearly and precisely in English.
introduction
Your essay has a clear introduction that identifies the topic and your stance on the issue of taking a gap year.
supported main points
You effectively use personal examples to illustrate your points, helping to make your arguments more relatable and compelling.
conclusion
The conclusion summarizes your main argument well and reiterates the benefits of taking a gap year effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • practical life experience
  • personal growth
  • independence
  • academic and career goals
  • in-depth exploration
  • renewed motivation
  • time management skills
  • matured perspective
  • academic detachment
  • formal education system
  • reintegration
  • financial burden
  • educational costs
  • lost income
  • increased educational costs
  • lack of structure
  • productive activities
  • proper planning
What to do next:
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