The following pie charts show the main modes of transportation people used to to travel to university for work or study in 2004 and 2009.

The following pie charts show the main modes of transportation people used to to travel to university for work or study in 2004 and 2009.
The above two pie charts demonstrate the
percentage
of people transportation methods are used to go to university for work or study in 2004 compared to 2009. The most significant feature is bus received the strongest
score
in 2009.
However
, the highest
percentage
in 2004 was related to car users.
In addition
, tain received the weakest number in both years. It is noticeable that the car
percentage
had
Verb problem
was
show examples
51% in 2004
then
started to decrease sharply in 2009 to 28%.
Moreover
,
In contrast
, the bus
score
shows a
dramatically
Change the adverb
dramatic
show examples
growth from 33% in 2004 to 46% in 2009.
In addition
, the bicycle
percentage
was 9% in 2004
then
started to increase gradually to 16% in 2004.
However
, the walking
score
exhibited
approximetaly
Correct your spelling
approximately
a similar amount in both years which
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
4% in 2004 and 6% in 2009.
In addition
, trains
contribute
Wrong verb form
contributed
show examples
the lowest
score
in both years with 3% in 2004 and 4% in 2009.
Submitted by rahafalkhashti7 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, in addition".
Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, score with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • means of transport
  • commuting patterns
  • sustainable travel
  • urban congestion
  • public transportation
  • private vehicles
  • carpooling
  • urban infrastructure
  • environmental impact
  • modal shift
  • cyclists
  • pedestrians
  • traffic volume
  • ride-sharing
  • policy initiatives
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